Spurs - Suns Series Thoughts/Litany of Excuses
Where We Stand Thus Far; A Cheeky Bastard Production
My online homies: apologies for my invisible coverage of this series. Thankfully, the postseason is just getting started and Lang, Sam and the rest have provided tons of content. You’ll be hearing from me with greater regularity starting…NOW. As such, I figured the best way to recap a matchup of overall invisible competitiveness would be to recap how my coverage became invisible.
Game 1: Excuse (Spent the Afternoon Giving Rival Baseball Fans An Ear Exam): Missed the instant-classic because I was in Philadelphia being a raucous Mets fan (at least according to the New York Times and MetsBlog).
Extra rambling: You might, in fact, one day find yourself at Shea Stadium staring at the back of a T-shirt that implies I intimately know a relative of a well known former Mets pitcher. Just to clarify: for multiple legitimate reasons, nothing happened, but it’s a funny story. Another clarifying point: though I wore a shirt that says “Philly sucks”, I very much like Philadelphia; I’d even go as far to say it’s an underrated town…now you could be sitting there saying, “Jake, that’s ridiculous–you went to a baseball game on day 1 of the NBA playoffs. To which I’d respond a) I committed to it back in February and still almost backed out b) it’s a long second season and c) I only have one local team that I exclusively support unconditionally without media bias (Nets) or general indifference (Jets) running interference. 20+ orange and blue compatriots taking a bus to tailgate on an 83 degree day? Exactly. I could have written a short book about the experience).
Game 2 Excuse (Rod Benson Ate My Homework): I didn’t end up giving my roommate enough leeway time with our game 2 DVR’ing. So that sucked. Considered doing a True-Hoopian or Ball-Truthian post that reflected what the internets were saying, but I’m neither a shark nor a biter, so like a Beatle walking past Micky D’s, I let it be. Also: I trust that those who read Slamonline but occasionally feel the need for something else peep what Skeets and Henry do on the regular. (Bonus inside post message to Yahoo’s Kelly Dwyer: If you ever have back problems, get at me. My best friend is a rising chiropractor. We call him Burt Backcrack.)
Game 3 Excuse (Boddingtons and Bitches*): Game 3 took place this Friday. We had it on in the background, but it sucked. By *it*, I mean the “The Suns” and “the game itself”. The Spurs were indeed clinical in breaking down their “rivals” (it’s a one way street, at the intersection of “letdown” and “really?”). Tony Parker went for 41, 12 and 3 turnovers; this Vincent Thomas post spontaneously combusted. (Related, I was talking to an acquaintance on Saturday night whose wife grew up with TP and Thierry Henry. What I could tell you about her is infinitely more interesting that what went down Friday night in Phoenix. By the way, you know, like, the one time of year that a Cactus needs water? Didn’t happen.
Game 4 Excuse (You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, anyway–so how about some mediocre coverage! I’ll haphazardly hand this one in! FREE CLINIC! MIX TAPE STYLES! (no) CLUE!):
Raja Bell hit a few threes before I started dozing off on my couch. The Suns lived to see another day. America, where we fail horribly and then masochistically prolong our impending failure!
The Suns were up 28 heading into the fourth quarter. Boris Diaw (20-10-8) was two assists shy of a triple double. Shaq got his double double on and the Suns held the Spurs to 39% from the floor. It’s really tempting not to completely write this game off as mere bump in the road for the Spurs. The excitement junkie prays that Phoenix finds their form. Bruce Bowen finished with a -35 plus/minus, which is as awful as it gets. Boris Diaw and Shaq gave Steve Nash some help containing Parker’s speed.
EXCUSE SUMMATION: Coverage is a funny bird. Like perspective, when you have it you don’t always appreciate its simple joys because you’re so busy working for it. When you don’t have it, you watch a movie like Sicko and realize that you can live just as miserably without it.
The coverage having turned out this way (Game 5 thus far withstanding), I guess it’s appropriate that I’ve covered the series this way. I didn’t get an “A” in journalism in Spain for nothing.
The series is mime. Game 5 tonight. I plan to watch it…
*=Colloquialism
42 Responses to “Spurs - Suns Series Thoughts/Litany of Excuses”
Apr.29 at 10:57 am
Ryan Jones says:
Rod Benson is overrated.
Apr.29 at 10:58 am
Ryan Jones says:
Not Jake, though.
Apr.29 at 10:59 am
Ryan Jones says:
“I didn’t get an “A” in journalism in Spain.”
What a strange sentence that is.
Apr.29 at 11:08 am
Jake Appleman says:
double negative? why?
Apr.29 at 11:09 am
Jake Appleman says:
Disagree re: RB. He’s “in there like swim wear.” And I enjoy swim wear.
Apr.29 at 11:11 am
Tariq says:
1- What does the footnote “Colloquialism” refer to? 2- I would like you to elaborate on that person who grew up with Thierry Henry and TP, please. Thanks.
Apr.29 at 11:12 am
Tariq says:
If possible, I’d like to know if there’s some deep, dark childhood secret that would explain why Henry falls down so much.
Apr.29 at 11:13 am
Jake Appleman says:
The word bitches, which is represented by the appropriate asterisk.
Apr.29 at 11:18 am
Tariq says:
I can’t find the asterisk, but I’m getting old, so it’s OK. By the way, Is Rod Benson related to Russ?
Apr.29 at 11:19 am
Jake Appleman says:
third cousin
Apr.29 at 11:32 am
Tariq says:
Jake: Figures.
Apr.29 at 11:43 am
Russ Bengtson says:
Jake’s proper coverage of his Game Five will make up for the psuedo-coverage of mine. Since I don’t seem to have NBA TV.
Apr.29 at 11:50 am
Russ Bengtson says:
Maybe I’ll write about 1995’s Game Five instead. There’ll be a lot more David Benoit that way.
Apr.29 at 11:55 am
SMK says:
I can get coverage anywhere. I come to SLAM for excuses. It makes me feel better about avoiding my own work.
Apr.29 at 12:03 pm
Jake Appleman says:
Wizznuttz too. Smart man.
Apr.29 at 12:23 pm
solly what says:
that was terrible. yet so typical that the only game you even ATTEMPTED to summarize was the ONE game where the Spurs didn’t manage to show up. Appar you’re on David Stern’s payroll as well….. Tonight: Suns are done.
Apr.29 at 12:55 pm
Jake Appleman says:
solly what: pick up a copy of slam 118 to see just how “on david stern’s payroll” i am. anyway, good to have some dissenters around these parts.
Apr.29 at 1:02 pm
Tariq says:
Jake: Want dissent? OK: That “Cheeky Bastard” tag is a lot more representative than the “AppleSon” tag. Payroller.
Apr.29 at 1:03 pm
Tariq says:
Before you got smart-alecky, I realize I should have said “label” instead “tag” a second time.
Apr.29 at 1:03 pm
Jake Appleman says:
i meant slam 119. which isn’t out yet. but you’ll have to get it.
Apr.29 at 1:06 pm
H to the izzo says:
The Cheeky Bastard thing is a Family Guy reference right?Or am I high?I get references a lot more while under the influence,or just make false connections betweens things,thus making them references……I should stop..
Apr.29 at 1:20 pm
TADOne says:
Having Appleman (or “cheeky bastard”) back from his hiatus is wonderful.
Apr.29 at 1:26 pm
Jake Appleman says:
i hope man u - barca is as riveting as this larry brown press conference
Apr.29 at 1:26 pm
Jake Appleman says:
yes, izzo it is
Apr.29 at 1:28 pm
H to the izzo says:
Jake:If it’s anything like last week,Two and a Half Men would be more riveting.
Apr.29 at 1:42 pm
Tariq says:
izzo: Come on. It wasn’t THAT bad. Of course, I maintain that any scoreless draw is, by definition, a borefest, but last week’s was pretty entertaining. Cristina missed a penalty and Barca missed a shipload of chances. Eto’o still hasn’t found his form after his multiple injuries. I hope Barca do the deed tonight, although I doubt it.
Apr.29 at 1:51 pm
BETCATS says:
This would be cooler if a zoombie wrote it. But it is still decent
Apr.29 at 3:33 pm
Ben Osborne says:
Russ the game is on TNT tonight. Funny stuff, Jake.
Apr.29 at 4:45 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Sounds like MU-Barca lived up?
Apr.29 at 5:03 pm
Tariq says:
Ryan:
It was pretty good. Even though this tie was not as goal-filled as I was expecting, it was pretty exciting, end-to-end stuff. Plus, if I knew how to type that “greater than” sign, I’d type Messi (is greater than) C.Ronaldo. Especially in big games. Zambrotta basically tied up Ronaldo completely tonight.
Apr.29 at 5:15 pm
Jake Appleman says:
Great goal. Game was decent, nothing I’ll remember in 2 years.
Apr.29 at 6:28 pm
WhaHuh says:
come on united
Apr.29 at 6:43 pm
Tariq says:
Yeah, what Jake said.
Apr.29 at 8:20 pm
Ben Osborne says:
Russ, I am a moron. When I saw your comment i looked in my newspaper at the listings and saw the two TNT games. “Your” game was not even in the paper, so it totally slipped my mind for that moment that you were referring to Jazz-Rockets. But that almost proves your point even further; there are deciding games being played on channels that don’t even get listed in newspapers. Go NBA!
Apr.29 at 8:32 pm
BETCATS says:
Osborne is admitting it, finally
Apr.29 at 10:38 pm
Dacre says:
I think the series is closer than it appears…if suns took game 1. it would be 2 - 2 so sure there is a momentum swing in the spurs favour, but each game needs to be approached as it is played.
Mind you….i have an upset stomach. please win suns.
Apr.29 at 10:40 pm
Dacre says:
JAKE APPLEMAN > If you don’t want to give a quality review of the series give the job to someone who does….sod off to the baseball.
Apr.30 at 12:49 am
Dacre says:
It’s over…..SUNS LOST
Apr.30 at 1:18 am
Jason says:
Spurs continue to crush dreams. Go Timmy!!
Apr.30 at 6:12 am
Hursty says:
wow, Dacre mustve out that on every single suns related story on slam. wow.
Apr.30 at 6:46 am
Ben Osborne says:
Whats up BETCATS? I’m one of the few people here who always treat you with respect. Why the hate?
Apr.30 at 11:09 pm
Dacre says:
…..this is madness. I need a holiday.