Shaq Isn’t Going Anywhere
Prepare yourselves for two more years of lethargic post moves (seriously, I’ve seen old people eat faster); the distinct possibility of fouling out every single night; and enormous chunks of the fourth quarter spent firmly planted on the bench with a glazed look in his eyes.
Yup, you guessed it, Shaquille O’Neal will play out the remainder of his contract with the Miami Heat.
In an interview Thursday, ESPN Radio’s Jack Ramsay told O’Neal, “I don’t hear retirement in your voice.'’
Responded O’Neal: “No, never that. I am the son of an army drill sergeant, and when we enlist, we go full term. So I’ve got two years left on my term and after that, I’ll be looking to do other things.'’
“I’ve also got this nasty divorce taking place; you might have gotten wind of it.”
“While we’re on the subject of finances, do you have any idea how much I spend each month? It’s a considerable amount, compadre”, Shaq did not necessarily add.
25 Responses to “Shaq Isn’t Going Anywhere”
Jan.25 at 1:01 pm
white hot eboy says:
Mutoni, to all new lows of shotty journalism. Good work, my man.
Jan.25 at 1:08 pm
jbn74sb says:
Look, Shaq is a fatf-ck, but, aside from the nitwit who was the subject of Into The Wild, who on earth would walk away from $40,000,000?
It is shocking to me that Shaq is only 2 years older than I am. He moves like he is about 76.
Jan.25 at 1:11 pm
peteb80 says:
But eboy predicted… And reminded us that he predicted…
Jan.25 at 1:12 pm
white hot eboy says:
And will stick by it, petey pablo.
Jan.25 at 1:17 pm
TheMC5 says:
$1500 a month on cable? Is he getting satellite feeds from Jupiter? What the heck?
Jan.25 at 1:37 pm
Myles Brown says:
Its easrier to just download p*rn Shaq. That pay per view sh*t is for the birds.
Jan.25 at 1:38 pm
G Diesel says:
Would the Heat be better of with Kwame Brown?
Jan.25 at 1:38 pm
white hot eboy says:
Nice Myles.
Jan.25 at 1:39 pm
jbn74sb says:
Of course - he makes less than half as much and his deal expires this year.
Jan.25 at 1:41 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Dr. Jack didn’t hear retirement in Shaq’s voice because Dr. Jack hasn’t been able to hear anything since 1986.
Jan.25 at 2:00 pm
Myles Brown says:
Russ you better leave the big homie alone. I love Dr.Jack. If he and Marv could do every NBA broadcast, Id be a happy-well happier-man.
Jan.25 at 2:03 pm
Co Co says:
So if Shaq misses the rest of the season do my Hawks still have to replay the final 51.9 seconds of the game he fouled out of? They won’t be able to recreate that moment in time without him so……..
Jan.25 at 2:28 pm
"Dr. Jack" says:
“LENARD!LENARD!”
Jan.25 at 2:47 pm
James says:
As an Alaskan, drop the Into the Wild comparisons.
Jan.25 at 3:00 pm
jbn74sb says:
James - To my knowledge, Alaskans hate that schmuck. No?
Jan.25 at 3:57 pm
Gumdrop says:
Alaskans hate Shaq?
Jan.25 at 4:03 pm
jbn74sb says:
Alaskans hate the guy who Into The Wild was based on.
Jan.25 at 4:33 pm
BETCATS says:
Feel sorry for the Heat. They are my 3rd favorite team (i cant belive i just typed that) and having the Old Ariostle is not helping the rebuliding effort.
Jan.26 at 12:09 am
GGG says:
If only he could lose some weight…he could turn back the clock (somewhat) and dominate again.
Jan.26 at 1:24 pm
Tariq says:
I have a sinking suspicion that Shaq hates Into the Wild. Don’t know why.
Jan.26 at 1:25 pm
Tariq says:
And Girls Gone Wild hate Alaska.
Jan.26 at 6:02 pm
h-dub says:
well, been a heat fan since 92 and still are. my man zo is gone and the heat is down again. shaq sitting on the bench laughing. but don´t get mad at him, get mad at riles and the organization for silly moves in the past 2 years. j-will is dead wood too. it´s only wade´s world now in MIA
Jan.28 at 10:43 am
dr doom says:
shag is good in miami. where els can he play?
he is not young anymore. let him be.
Jan.28 at 11:25 am
markis6385 says:
i still think if he was in shape the colud do sum damage. Shaq is 1 of my all-time favorite players man and 4 all yall hatin on him now it’s cuz u remember how he used 2 straight up murder yo squad in his day.Diesel 4 life!
Jan.29 at 1:15 am
Dacre says:
Diesel for life…??!?! Hey we’re switching to clean fuel sources nowadays.
Try the SUNs.