Links: The New Official Player Of The Links
Plus: Isiah, Etan, Brett Favre and other assorted stuff…Lukasz!
Sam still doesn’t want to talk about this, but I’ll bring it up: Sam’s team, the Mets, choked. It’s probably not the worst choke job in the history of sports, but it’s up there. Waaaay up there. For the last six months, I’ve listened almost daily to Sam’s Mets rhetoric, about how the Mets are the team to beat, about how the Mets are a championship-caliber team, about how David Wright should be the MVP, about how Jose Reyes should be the MVP, blah blah blah. And about six months ago I said something about, “Don’t you guys need pitching?”
Turns out they did.
I’m sort of in mourning today because my Braves announced that Andruw Jones is dunzo in the ATL. I read the stor online last night and, honestly, felt a lump in my throat. Andruw’s been my favorite Braves player for over a decade now, and now he’s gone because his agent wants more money. I’ll still root for him, wherever he ends up, but it hurts to see him leave.
Anyway, all the SLAM people have now seen their favorite baseball teams eliminated, except for Khalid, who is a mercurial Red Sox fan. And with NBA teams reporting to camp and starting practice, it’s time for The Links to be resurrected, to come to life once again with power and fury, like the Marlins against traitor Tom Glavine in the first inning on Sunday.
So, I’ll be here with you five days a week from now until July. (Well, mostly five days a week. Except if I’m traveling or too busy or whatever.) Either way, my goal is to post at least five times a week.
Lots to get to today…
• It’s on the homepage, but today we posted this statement of solidarity with the Jena 6. A bunch of people from the sports world, from Joakim Noah to Scott Fujita to Dr. John Carlos were willing to lend their names to this cause. SLAM columnist Dave Zirin initially contacted me about a week ago, and I told him we’d love to post it on SLAMonline. Not much else to say about it — I think it speaks for itself.
• One of the people involved in the Jena 6 stuff from the beginning has been Wizards center and SLAMonline columnist Etan Thomas (who wrote this great take on things a few weeks ago). Then, yesterday, word broke that while undergoing a routine physical, doctors found a “cardiac irregularity” with Etan and as far as I know he has not, as yet, been cleared to play basketball.
That’s really all I know about the situation. I exchanged text messages with Etan this morning, just letting him know that the SLAM fam was thinking about him and hoping for the best, and he said he appreciated it. I’d never even spoken to Etan a year ago at this time, but then we got connected and since he’s been doing his columns for us, we’ve gotten to know each other pretty well. When he writes a piece (and he actually does sit down and write it out — not dictate it or do an “as told to” column) he emails it to me, and I edit them and post to the site, so we email and text message back and forth to keep in touch. Agree or disagree with Etan’s opinions — and even I don’t agree with everything Etan writes — I respect him for having opinions and not being afraid to say what he thinks. We need more people like him in sports.
Hang in there, big guy.
• Is Brett Favre the Steve Nash of the NFL? Aging white guys beloved by the media who both found wild success later in the careers with their second franchises…although Nash never was addicted to painkillers, at least not that I know about.
• One thing about this Isiah trial that I thought about today…wonder what Marv Albert thinks about all this? And as with all things New York, Andrea Peyser gets the last word.
• Finally, we need a new official player of The Links, and I think I found him yesterday. I was flipping through funny pictures to put together this post, and I came across this photo.
Until the exact moment I clicked on that link, I’d never heard of Lukasz Obrzut. (Though I respect his gangsta, with the two “z”s in his name and wearing the strange number 48.) I figured he must have been some sort of European prospect the Pacers uncovered overseas, so I googled him and found out dude played at Kentucky the last few years. What’s really strange is that he’s not even listed on the Pacers roster. Maybe he just showed up at camp and they let him in because he’s seven feet? I also found out here that he’s known as “Woo,” which I thought was just a bad Jada Pinkett film.
Still, my favorite thing about his is his haircut, which appears to be inspired by Randy Quaid’s Amish bowler in the underrated Kingpin. (And for some reason yesterday, everyone in the comments said Lukasz looks like me, which is patently racist: All white guys with facial hair look alike? I’ve been told I look like various people, but my favorite lookalike for me is former BET host Donnie Simpson, who allegedly has the same smile as I do.)
Anyway, let’s all root for Lukasz to make the Pacers. We need him as much as he needs us.
42 Responses to “Links: The New Official Player Of The Links”
Oct.3 at 3:59 pm
white hot eboy says:
Lang, denial is the first step in recovery.
Oct.3 at 4:03 pm
J says:
Andruw was a lot like my Mets, he choked too. Choked to come up on a big pay day. Way to bat under .220. Does Jordan Brand sigh only athletes falling off??
Oct.3 at 4:03 pm
H to the izzo says:
So Eboy are you gonna show up at the SLAM offices or not,the security needs to be organized.
Oct.3 at 4:06 pm
backboard says:
sorry, but i think you look like a bigger fred durst…
Oct.3 at 4:08 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Dude, ANOTHER irrelevant white guy with a weird name?
Oct.3 at 4:09 pm
white hot eboy says:
Izzo, if I did, they’d probably block my posting priveleges and I’d have nothing to do at work once I got back!!!
Oct.3 at 4:17 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
I live for irrelevant white guys with weird names.
Oct.3 at 4:20 pm
Myles Brown says:
I’d pay at least $8.00 to see Brett Favre rip his shirt open on the dance floor like Steve Nash.
Oct.3 at 4:21 pm
Bryan says:
I just asked on another thread how you were taking the Andrew Jones thing..I am not a braves fan since I’m a Met fan and not to put a damper on stuff but I’m sad to see andruw walk too..My brother died 2 months ago and he was a baseball player and lifelong braves fan and this season he got to throw out the first pitch of the braves seasons and got to hang with Andruw Jones who was really nice to him and I know it meant the world to him.So as much as I hate the Braves being a Met fan..You gotta repect that no matter how bad his stats were this year, he was a good guy at least to my brother.
Oct.3 at 4:23 pm
white hot eboy says:
Cool story, Bryan. That was a class move towards your brother.
Oct.3 at 4:23 pm
H to the izzo says:
Bryan,thats sh*t,sorry man
Oct.3 at 4:24 pm
jbn74sb says:
I veto that clown as the Official Player of the Links. He can’t even make the Pacers roster.
Oct.3 at 4:25 pm
jbn74sb says:
I’m with you Bryan. Cool story.
Oct.3 at 4:27 pm
Bryan says:
Thanks.. I didn’t mean to bring everyone down if I did ..Eboy I just saw on another thread where you said “Bryan hates european fowards” and again I cracked up this guy thinks I’m crazy for real.
Oct.3 at 4:30 pm
H to the izzo says:
Bryan don’t feel too bad about the European players thing,Eboy hates white people
Oct.3 at 4:32 pm
Bryan says:
Moderate my previous comment!
Oct.3 at 4:32 pm
Bryan says:
I hate Peja and Hedo.But mostly Peja.
Oct.3 at 4:34 pm
jj says:
you should make Kyrylo Fesenko the official player. Dude’s funny as hell. And he’s been assured a spot. And he’s 7 feet. And he’s white. And he’s irrelevant (perhaps). And he’s also got a funny haircut.
Oct.3 at 4:38 pm
Bryan says:
!
Oct.3 at 4:46 pm
white hot eboy says:
Look, Lang used Ben Hand-log-ten. You CAN”T get worse than that, can you?
Oct.3 at 4:56 pm
dma says:
kingpin is handsdown one of the most underrated comedy films. the landlord scenes = classic
Oct.3 at 4:57 pm
jbn74sb says:
I’d probably try to stoke my interest in the league by similarly odd methods if I were a Hawks fan.
Oct.3 at 5:17 pm
Bryan says:
Damn I still didn’t moderated the comment lost all meaning!
Oct.3 at 5:19 pm
Bryan says:
I still didn’t get moderated*
Oct.3 at 5:31 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
I miss Ben Handlogten. He wasn’t the Official Player of The Links because of his hair or his race, but because the man’s last name was friggin’ Hand Log Ten.
Oct.3 at 5:43 pm
Dallas J says:
Links! Lukasz Obrzut! Lang.. now we need to know how in the hell to pronounce that.
Oct.3 at 5:45 pm
CJ says:
As a close relative of Lang, my vote is that he does NOT look like Lucasz. For what it’s worth…
Oct.3 at 5:55 pm
chronically_ill says:
What happened to Ben Handlogten? Is he playing in Europe or something?
Oct.3 at 5:56 pm
chronically_ill says:
And was Ben Handlogten ever aware that he was once the Official Player of The Links?
Oct.3 at 6:07 pm
J says:
RIP to your bro….but since I have to joke around…did your brother run the Gold Club?
Oct.3 at 7:31 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
Nah, I never got to tell Handlogten. When the Jazz came to new York I went and was going to interview him and write about it for The Links but he didn’t come to NYC because his wife went into labor or something. And then he got cut a few months later.
Oct.3 at 7:32 pm
Chris O says:
It took me a minute to read dudes last name. I’m fearing I’ve got the same haircut as this guy.
Oct.3 at 7:39 pm
James Martin says:
I had a class with Lukasz, he’s hilarious, I just wish Tubby would have played him more. He just went out did work every minute he got to play.
Oct.3 at 7:42 pm
h-wag says:
Don´t know what´s up with Handlogten.
After his very short stint in Barcelona about 1 1/2 years ago I haven´t heard anything about him. At least no signing in Europe.
Oct.3 at 8:05 pm
SMK says:
I think his name is pronounced “Greg Kite”.
Oct.3 at 8:08 pm
dOnRummY says:
As far the whereabouts of Ben Handlogten, and his knowledge of his history with “The Links”, I don’t know what the facts are but somebody’s certainly going to sit down with him and find out what he knows that they may not know, and make sure he knows what they know that he may not know, and that’s a good thing.
Oct.3 at 9:49 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
A quick Google News search for “Ben Handlogten” reveals zero stories. So obviously he’s now an undercover agent of some kind.
Oct.3 at 10:24 pm
Mikel says:
I suggest you do a side-by-side photo comparison…a separated at birth, Lang edition, if you will
Oct.4 at 4:29 am
Slobodan Chutzpah says:
I’m saying it again despite you guys not clearing my comment with links to the undeniable photographic proof: Lang looks like Evan Seinfeld who appeared in “Oz” and played in the band Biohazard. In fact, they might be the same person. Go google it, suckers.
Oct.4 at 5:38 am
TC says:
nice wig Lang !!
Oct.4 at 1:48 pm
Dallas J says:
Seperated at birth: Lang and Lukasz Obrzut - Dave Mustaine and The New Rob Swiffle.. play wit it
Oct.6 at 6:57 am
anf says:
Lang in wig, this is what I first thought when I saw the images on gettyimages!