He returns to you. Watching.
How you have grown when I was away
The details of my vacation are inconsequential to you and personal to me. All you need to know is that I climbed to the peak of the highest mountain. Swam to the murky depths of the deepest sea. Threw my mercy on a golden wolf, who led us through the blackest jungle and taught us the secrets of the blade. I murdered many a winged beast in cold blood with no thought of remorse. Unleashed a godless fury of annihilation across the chessboard. Ripped the very stars out of the heavens and held them in my war stained hands.
I also spent a lot of time reading epic literature, so my pattern of speech has been somewhat affected. For example, during the chess wars with my girlfriend, I couldn’t contain myself from taking her rook and proclaiming things like “BLOOD HAS BEEN SPILLED ON THE BATTLEFIELD!!!”
My life on vacation was the complete opposite of what it normally is. Instead of staring at a glowing box all day, reading short bursts of information, and churning out short bursts of material, I was detached from technology. Time was passed by reading and learning from 500 page books back to back. A vastly different experience.
I was born in Brooklyn, and with only a few breaks, I’ve spent pretty much my whole life in an urban environment. It’s just what I am used to and accept as the way the world is. The very best thing about going away was the serene quiet.
There was no television, no movies, no computer, no phone, no video games, and no internet. No pressure to do anything. Like I said, it was a different world. For the first time in a long time, I could actually hear myself think. For a naturally introspective person like myself, it was paradise in its purest form. If this all sounds like the ramblings of a madman, I counter by telling you that I have never felt more sane in my life, and that this is “the real me.”
Back to the business of slamonline. I was so far removed from my regular day that I have no concept of anything that happened in the world since last Saturday morning. I can see that the Mutoni explosion has begun, and he has been doing a great job keeping the site flush with new content, and our old bloggers have been chiming in during the summertime as well. I will have to head to the office and play lots of catch up.
The newest new look to the site is of course beautiful. This is the first post I tag as “The Watcher”, so let’s see how it goes. I see that the NY Times is suggesting that we should have to pay $1.25 for the paper version now, but that’s about the only thing I know of that happened in the outside world, basketball or otherwise. Would someone be so kind as to inform me of what has been happening in the world over the past 10 days?
32 Responses to “He returns to you. Watching.”
Jul.16 at 8:19 am
Ryan Jones says:
Untalented anorexic blonde girls are now unbelievabley famous, Sam. Was that happening before you left?
Jul.16 at 8:20 am
Ryan Jones says:
Also, “unbelievabley” is how you spell “unbelievably” at 8:15 in the morning before you’ve had caffeine. Is that new, too?
Jul.16 at 8:30 am
Cheryl says:
My blog is up. when you get a chance, come check out ASPOV. shameless plugging of the ramblings of the ultra-informed…
Jul.16 at 8:45 am
white hot eboy says:
Sam, good to have you back. The new logo actually looks like it could be used as a movie font for a Sixth Sense/Others type of movie. And with your fancy, fandangled new literary prowess, you could probably wright a cool screenplay working around “The Watcher” deal. Oh, and the Heat lost out in the Mo Williams derby.
Jul.16 at 8:46 am
white hot eboy says:
Or write. Sorry.
Jul.16 at 8:55 am
Cheryl says:
You must have had Dorrell on your mind, Eboy, and if he’ll get some burn this coming season.
Jul.16 at 9:02 am
Rasheedionics says:
Welcome back Sam… You didn’t miss much. Some guys got signed. Kobe still on Lakers. Greg Oden got some cut up… Oh yea, Tony Parker was inducted into the French Legion of Honour on Saturday. He joins the recently inducted singer/actress Barbara Streisand in possession of France’s highest civilian honour… Gangsta??? You decide…
Jul.16 at 9:44 am
Kevin says:
Mutoni got in trouble in Montreal. He wont say why.
Jul.16 at 10:21 am
Khalid Salaam says:
Well, you did miss Transformers…..
Jul.16 at 10:37 am
Ben Osborne says:
The Dodgers regained first place.
Jul.16 at 10:42 am
mutoni says:
i finally learned how to read.
Jul.16 at 10:46 am
J3K says:
You’re lucky you missed Transformers.
Jul.16 at 10:49 am
Jeri says:
So you’re a big bald guy in a toga? Welcome Uatu! (Hopefully someone gets that)
Jul.16 at 11:18 am
Atrain says:
You missed the arrival of Artest’s 300 pound brother. Oh yeah, and your Knicks owe around $45 mill in luxury tax…Z-Bo in the house!
Jul.16 at 11:39 am
Lang Whitaker says:
The Mets started panicking.
Jul.16 at 11:41 am
Ben Collins says:
So the “real you” talks like Napoleon? I SHALL RETURN ON WEDNESDAY AND WE SHALL FIGHT TO THE DEATH, ANGRY AT YOUR LACK OF KNOWLEDGE OF THE LAST WEEK OF CULTURE AND THE SIGNING OF MO WILLIAMS.
Jul.16 at 12:07 pm
H to the izzo says:
INDEED THE BATTLE OF THE AGES RUBENSTEIN- COLLINS,THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENT SHALL BE SPILLED,EVEN THE MOST TRECHOROUS OF EVIL BEINGS WILL COWER IN FEAR AT THE VERY THOUGHT OF THIS VALIANT-MYTHOLOGICAL FUED-epic writing is fun
Jul.16 at 12:09 pm
DP says:
I need to do what you did Sam, just go and get some space. I need to read book cuz I haven’t read one since like last summer and that was for school. Anyway, I cannot believe Mo is not going to Miami! Oh well I guess Mill town is going to do something big this year. play wit it.
Jul.16 at 12:39 pm
Ben Collins says:
OH YES IT SHALL BE FIERY AND TERRIBLE AND CHILDREN WILL SCREAM LIMBS WILL BE SEVERED AND HOVA CAN BE THE REFEREE AND I DON’T KNOW WHY I SCREAMED THAT LAST PART
Jul.16 at 12:58 pm
Ben Collins says:
yes i am reduced a dull roar now that nguni for noticing
Jul.16 at 1:00 pm
Nguni says:
you wanted ur lungs to get sore?
Jul.16 at 1:03 pm
Detroit11 says:
Gary Sheffield started ranting about racism in baseball. Gripping stuff!
Jul.16 at 1:12 pm
H to the izzo says:
Ben I am flattered,but theres only one person who could referee such an epic battle and thats god,I could However commentate and do my best Howard Cossell.
Jul.16 at 1:34 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
Thanks for the updates and grandiose speech everyone. Challenge me not or I SHALL CLEAR THE EARTH OF THEE!!! (That is “sampled” from Moby Dick)
Mutoni has been on fire. My favorite one-liner of his: Have fun in Memphis, Darko. Try not to kill yourself.
I think I’m caught up with the general news. Nate Robinson the summer league MVP? Is this planet earth?
Jul.16 at 2:53 pm
Greased Up Deaf Guy aka Clay Davis says:
the watcher is corny..wtf kinda name is that? peoples champ was better
Jul.16 at 3:02 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
So wait, now I’m just an “old blogger”? I think I need to go somewhere where there’s no internet—for the rest of my life. Short though it may be.
Jul.16 at 3:25 pm
albie1kenobi says:
LOUD NOISES.
Jul.16 at 3:50 pm
Tariq says:
Hey Sam, what did you read?
Jul.16 at 5:52 pm
Troy Dallas says:
Hey Sam, no need to dump the people’s champ. That could just be your alter ego like TI & Tip.
Jul.16 at 8:00 pm
Young Chris #3 says:
The end of this post when Sam mentions how the only thing he has realized that has gone on was the price change of the New York Times and asks for an update of what’s been going on reminded me of Mike Judge’s recent satire, “Idiocracy.” Check it out, good stuff.
Jul.17 at 6:48 am
WeS says:
Welcome back.
Jul.17 at 11:34 am
Hisham says:
‘thee’ is dutch for ‘tea’… don’t take away my tea! i like tea