By Jake Appleman

–Port Authority sucks. I hate Port Authority more than any other place in New York City. During the season, the bus left from gate 305. For game 6 of the Raptors series, the bus left between the two PA buildings outside. Today, it leaves from gate 207, yet nobody has idea until we wander around the place for 15 minutes.

–I’ve been relegated to third string media seating up in section 205. This sucks but it also brings me back to my glory days as a Nets fan when I had ticket plans in sections 209, 216 and 239. The high five homies of section 216 will always hold a special place in my heart, though I’m somewhat happy that I’ll never wear a playoff towel underneath a Nets bucket hat ever again. The positive aspect of these seats is that they’re better for watching plays unfold. Premeditated dive cuts, I see you!

–Mikki Moore, wide open in the paint, actually does a jumping jack to alert his teammates that he’s open. That was comedy. Mikki has liked it to the tune of 6 points in the first 4+ minutes, including a facial over Sasha Pavlovic.

–Two 3’s by Kidd, corner pocket and side pocket respectively, put the Nets up 14-4. The Cavs call timeout and metrosexual guy and the Nets dancers come out to fling t-shirts to a crowd that was already given free red t-shirts. What a waste of fabric.

–Jason Collins blocks a Drew Gooden shot and gets it stuck between the rim and the backboard. Man, he can’t even block a shot correctly.

–What does it say about Vince that the Nets are up 20-9 and I’m questioning his shot selection? In a bit of mixed news, Vince picks up his second foul with 2:39 left in the quarter.

–Charge called on RJ. I could’ve sworn Anderson Varejao was still moving, though it might have just been his hair flopping.

–For a team up 9, the Nets have made quite a few stupid mistakes.

End of 1: 22-15 Nets. The Cavs are shooting just under 28%.

–James Gandolfini, a.k.a Tony Soprano, is in the house. I have this urge to breathe heavily and blow the air loudly out of my nose in his honor. I’ve always enjoyed the idiosyncracies of the Soprano character as portrayed by Gandolfini.

–I’m pretty sure an errant Marcus Williams pass just drilled Howard Beck of the New York Times in the face. But I’m not sure because I’m sitting in Secaucus. And the third pick in 2007 NBA DRAFT…goes to…The Boston Celtics!

–Spliff Robinson wins the Russ Bengtson memorial “Stop Shooting” award for the first minute+ of the second quarter. Also worth noting: Larry Hughes is working on a lifetime achievement award.

–The Nets have gotten two shots two go in which the ball bounced up off the back off the iron and straight through. Fuck you, David Blaine. And fuck your magnets. If I didn’t hate Blaine so much, I’d put the Ryan Jones memorial asterisk between both of those F bombs, but I really dislike Blaine.

–It’s Memorial Day soon.

–The Nets are currently (8:06 left in the second) out-rebounding Cleveland 15-10.

–You know in Utah how everyone wears those free powder blue shirts, or how in Golden State everyone wears the yellow ones? Well, today about half the fans are wearing their free red t-shirts. Other than a lack of noise and a mind-boggling disinterest at times, that’s the difference between 87% of Nets fans and real fans.

–Led by Drew and Z, the Cavs clip a once promising 12 point lead to 1. A Larry Hughes jumper gives Cleveland the lead. The Nets are freezing right now. They were at 45% after 1 and now the Cavs are out-shooting them.

–Without Jason Kidd’s four 3’s the Nets might be eliminated already. As it is, his fourth ties the game at 40. And to think, Rod Thorn nearly gave him up for a shit sandwich (Jordan Farmar and the possibility of Andrew Bynum being the bread)…

–Vince hits a pretty leaner. And-1. The Nets should hire a team of 8 year old girls subliminally enter his mind and chant things like:

BE AGGRESSIVE
B-E AGGRESSIVE
B-E A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E
AGGRESSIVE!

(Repeat for entire game).

End of 2: 45-43 Nets.

–The Nets start the third clicking on all cylinders. The Cavs, meanwhile, are shooting blanks. I had this sweeping sensation come over me during the second quarter, but it has faded quickly. It’s amazing what a few minutes can do.

–Big Z gets called for a moving screen and then gets hit with a T for arguing the call. Personally, I think it was the way that he stalked over to the ref, hovering over him for a moment while berating him that earned him the tech.

–(6:07) Jason Kidd has officially entered the Billy Hoyle zone, somewhat fitting because Woody Harrelson is a Warriors fan and Kidd is from Oakland. Kidd is 7-10 from the floor and 5-6 from three. Richard Jefferson gets in on the act too, wetting a three and nailing two freebies to put the Nets up 15.

–THE NETS ARE RUNNING!

–Mikki Moore and Varejao get into it and both earn techs.

–If Vince Carter’s jumper has an STD yet his drives to the rim are clean, why would he keep f—ing with the wrong trick? Does it just feel so good or something?

–Jason Kidd is amazing. He’s a guy to marvel at. I don’t think I say it enough, so there you go.

End of 3: 73-64 Nets.

–The Boston Snackbar, off all game long, hasn’t been serving much of anything today. It would behoove him to open up the kitchen so that the Nets can have an easier time winning this game.

–Some good work by Varejao–the possession after wetting two freebies, he flashes into the lane and LeBron finds him for an easy 2–followed by a King James 3 bring the Cavs to within 4, 77-73.

–Even though they’re moving without the ball on offense, with Kidd on the bench, the Nets are cluttered and unsure of themselves.

–Mikki Moore, ever the overzealous little child excited about cereal, picks up his SECOND offensive interference call. If the Nets lose by under 4, remember this. After a turnover, Moore, ever the overzealous overachiever, hammers one on Z’s head.

–6:44: Jason Kidd has just gone to the floor twice in the past 20 seconds to out-hustle everybody. Kudos.

–Kidd throws a bomb to a cherry picking VC, who finishes with a simple dunk. 83-73 Nets. “TOUCHDOWN NETS!” Gary Sussman exclaims. Well done, Gary. I thoroughly enjoyed that. Unrelated, can you please give Sam and I a Continental seat upgrade for game 4? We’d even let Vonage sponsor us.

–Kidd finds Jefferson streaking baseline for a reverse layup. And-1, free throw missed. When these Nets play the right way, they can make it look so free and easy.

–1:40 Mike Brown concedes victory putting in a big white flag (Ira Newble) and a big white guy (Scott Pollard).

–Milk carton: Sasha Pavlovic.

Final: 96-85 Nets.

Jason Kidd finishes with 23 points, 14 assists and 13 rebounds and moves into second place, behind only Magic Johnson, in career playoff triple doubles. With Kidd playing at an otherworldly level, Richard Jefferson back to 100% and team defense like that, Vince Carter could throw feces at the rim 8 times a game and the Nets would still stand a good chance of winning at home.

Am I being hard on Vince? Yes. Why? Because it’s nauseating to watch him take bad shots. It’s like watching a beautiful girl draw on her face with lipstick. This matters because it’s highly doubtful that Kidd will shoot so well on Monday night, and it’s also highly doubtful that LeBron will be contained as well as he was this afternoon.