Virginia Tech, Joey Crawford, Swag
Also, Don Nelson admits he’s impotent. Really.
It’s hard for me to know what to say about what happened yesterday at Virginia Tech. Sure, I can assemble all the horrific facts: 33 people killed, at least 17 injured by the shooter, countless others injured while trying to escape. But the basic numbers tend to initially overwhelm and then numb us. The thought that there’s 33 sets of parents, including the shooter’s parents, who lost someone dear to them, that they brought into the world, is what eats at me and should continually break all of our hearts.
Honestly, I don’t even really want to talk about this. I suppose there’s a part of me that hopes that if I ignore it, everything will just go away. It won’t, obviously, but I wish it would. Do my opinions about this even matter? I’m no more qualified to speak about it than any of you are. We all feel terrible about it, I’m sure.
I can say, however, that in the midst of all the headlines and “experts” on TV talking ad nauseum about gun control and safety issues and all of the underlying issues, it’s easy to let what happened get clouded. Instead of trying to figure out motives or blaming people for not sending out emails or whatever, first and foremost let’s all try and remember the people who were lost and the lives and loved ones they left behind.
• Moving on to the NBA, for all you Wizards fans, Linkstigator Joel Kimmel sent along this painting of Gilbert. “I wanted to depict Gil as the incredible performer that he is, designing the piece as a circus poster,” Joel says. “If you want to see more of my basketball portraits, please take a look at my website for Carmelo, Dirk, Steve, and KG.” Pretty cool, I thought. Joel, if you don’t get a mention in the DC Sports Bog, Steinberg is slacking.
• The NBA has suspended Joey Crawford for the rest of the season and the Playoffs. What’s surprising about this is that they came out and announced it, even putting a release on NBA.com. Referees are disciplined from time to time, but their punishment is usually kept on the hush. So why would the NBA suddenly come out swinging like this? Maybe because the Playoffs start in a few days and the David Stern Robot wants people to think that the L would never fix a game?
Nah. Of course not.
I do like how Duncan admitted that he did call Crawford “a piece of sh*t.” Duncan’s going all gangsta on us.
• LeBron has unveiled a new three-point shot just in time for the Playoffs. More players need to unveil drastic alterations to their games right before the Playoffs, instead of just growing beards or wearing black socks or whatever. (By the way, if you had tp pick someone to copy your new jump shot from, would Ira Newble really be your first choice?)
• About four months ago, I mentioned in passing that the Hawks were getting new uniforms next season, and then was told I wasn’t supposed to know anything about them. Well, I did know about them. And now word is finally starting to filter out to the message boards as people are getting glimpses. The Hawks are finally dumping the yellow/red color scheme, which is waaaay overdue, since it makes them look more like a fast food restaurant than a sports franchise.
The Hawks are going to blue, red and white, which is actually the franchise’s old colors. I know a few people who’ve seen the new uniforms and reactions have been mixed. One person who saw them last week said they were hot. But to me, anything’s better than what we have now. I’m hoping the new jerseys take some cues from their first jerseys in Atlanta.
• There’s a bit in this story that’s hilarious. The story is all about what a great leader Brandon Roy has become for the Blazers in only his rookie season. (To be fair, the team’s previous leader was Zach Randolph, and whenever your team leader is accused of running a train on someone in court documents, it’s probably not that tough to take the lead. Er, regarding the leadership, that is.)
Anyway, everyone in the story raves about Roy and talks about what a great player and person he is. And there’s a story about how he stood up to Randolph after one game, like that was kind of the passing of the torch between the two. His teammates and coaches all remember that crucial situation, the moment the franchise went from being Jail Blazers to Trailblazers…well, everyone remembers it except for one guy:
“I remember it, but I came in a little late,” Jarrett Jack said. “But that’s Brandon. He’s outspoken when he needs to be.”
• QUOTE OF THE DAY:
REPORTER: Is it important for you guys to see how your small lineup works against the Mavs?
DON NELSON: “I’m impotent, too. I just went to the doctor, he told me I was impotent so I went out and bought me a new suit.”
TMI, Nellie, TMI.
• The Sonics might be getting set to blast off to Oklahoma City. As long as they take Lenny with them.
39 Responses to “Virginia Tech, Joey Crawford, Swag”
Apr.17 at 2:58 pm
J-Bird says:
Good, now we wont have to deal with any Crawford shenanigans in the playoffs
Apr.17 at 3:10 pm
Detroit11 says:
Damn, Nellie?! What did that have to do w/ the question posed?! That was still gangsta tho….
Apr.17 at 3:17 pm
KILLAGORILLA says:
Virginia Tech happens in Iraq every day guys - we need to remember that we are not the only country suffering..also, Joey Crawford and Steve Javie should be freakin canned!
Apr.17 at 3:18 pm
dez says:
Nellie’s hilarious. BDiddy needs to be in the playoffs
Apr.17 at 3:20 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
I eagerly await Zydrunas Ilgauskas’s playoff beard.
Apr.17 at 3:25 pm
white hot eboy says:
KILLAGORILLA, I think everyone knows that were not the only one’s in the world suffering but if you had a tragedy occur in YOUR house and then later heard of a tragedy that occured to some random neighbor on the other side of town, which one is going to affect YOU more?
Apr.17 at 3:36 pm
ALX8725 says:
Russ, you should check out Baron Davis’s beard, pure savagery. I hope he keeps it if my Warriors make the playoffs.
Apr.17 at 3:43 pm
B Jeezy says:
“I remember it, but I came in a little late” lol great job of trancessing the story to that quote Lang. By the way the Debo Train chooo chooo was leader of the asylum…
Apr.17 at 3:57 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
killagorilla get off this board with that BS and show some respect.
Apr.17 at 4:05 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Oh, B-Diddy’s beard is an all-timer, no question. But he’s got that year-round, as you implied. When Big Z goes into full-on Bond villain role, IT’S ON.
Apr.17 at 4:22 pm
Max Airington says:
That painting is phenomenal. I wouldnt be surprised if Gil tried to buy it.
Apr.17 at 4:35 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
I’m also quite sure that Don Nelson’s impotence has nothing to do with the fact that he drinks Miller Lite by the truckload.
Apr.17 at 4:46 pm
Dblizzy! says:
BDiddy’s beard is pretty gangster, he could probably cornrow the sides. It’s about time the law got laid down on these refs, they always want to be a part of the action. I shouldn’t hear Joey Crawford or Dick Bavetta and be able to say “Oh thats that NBA ref” They should be invisible.
Apr.17 at 4:48 pm
Shiz says:
I never…EVER…want to hear Don Nelson mention anything remotely resembling erectile functionality…Its just gross…Maybe if ya put the spirits down, you might could get it up, Uncle Nellie…Kudos to BRoy for taking charge…U too Khalid…
Apr.17 at 4:50 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
If the Hawks want to change their colors to red, white and blue AND improve as a team, they should just wear Pistons jerseys next season and hope everyone gets confused.
Apr.17 at 5:12 pm
Dblizzy! says:
Yeah we’ll just have Joe Johnson were a face mask and dye a grey patch into Josh Smith’s head. lol
Apr.17 at 6:44 pm
KILLAGORILLA says:
No disrespect intended at all!! The loss of life is tragic, and especially in this senseless incident. I’m just saying, how would we feel if this happened everyday? Because it does happen everyday for some and we gotta change that man. No more political talk on the SLAMBOARD for me!!!
Apr.17 at 6:46 pm
Dennard C says:
I am still trying to figure out how playing a small lineup relates to not being able to get it up?
Apr.17 at 7:00 pm
sk says:
bout time the league does something 2 these tec happy refs. I fine myself watching less baskball games cause now the refs are stars also. WTF Is Too Easy, Muslim now, his beard is off the hook.
Apr.17 at 7:21 pm
LordGefroh says:
A couple of things: - Inciteful thoughts on the tragedy at VTech. Thanks, Lang.
- Big ups to the artist who painted the Gilbert circus poster. Gilbert standing on an elephant with a pet lion…THAT’S gangsta.
- I said this on the Joey Crawford post, but I’ll say it again: Crawford vs. Javie cage match. Make it happen, DStern.
- Roy is the truth! We Blazer fans are lucky to have him. And that train joke was unsafe, unsanitary, and uncalled for.
- Where did you get that Don Nelson quote? There must be some context for him to say that, it seems totally nonsensical.
Apr.17 at 7:38 pm
don nelson's new suit says:
I hope Joey Knuckles buys a ticket to every Spurs playoff game and sits right behind their bench.
Apr.17 at 10:25 pm
bsktbllref says:
joey crawford is the most arrogant referees in the business. he thinks he is the show. just watch how he backpedals of sidepedals down the court. never has an expression that he is having fun
Apr.17 at 10:53 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
The Nellie quote was (I think) on the Ft. Worth Star-Telegram’s website. One of the Dallas papers. Re-read the question from the reporter…Nellie was pretending he heard “impotent” instead of “important.”
Apr.17 at 11:02 pm
Phil B. says:
The Don Nelson remark sounds like part of a VERY old and lame joke, in which the word “impotent” is pronounced im-PO’-tant. The tag line is that a guy diagnosed with impotance goes out and buys a suit because “if I’m going to be impotant, I’m going to look impotent.” The speaker is supposed to use a minstrel accent. Yes, it’s a racist joke… so what made Nellie think of it? Speaking of lame, was he channeling Don Imus or something?
Apr.17 at 11:07 pm
LordGefroh says:
LIL ROMEO GAVE A VERBAL COMMITMENT TO USC!!!!!!
Apr.17 at 11:10 pm
Drolfe says:
Tim Duncan seems to have become a lot more humanized because of this Joey Crawford situation. Less of the complex moving parts of a robot, and more of the soft fleshy limbs of a person. Me likey.
Apr.18 at 3:49 am
luckyluciano says:
I hate to be the one to tell Americans this, esp when Bush said this was unavoidable, but GET RID OF AUTOMATIC GUNS = NO MORE HORRIFIC SHOOTINGS.
It actually gets me fuking wild that hicks want to keep their guns so they can shoot beer cans or ballin balls or whatever, so this type of shit can keep happenin..
In Australia we had the same thing until after 33 people were killed in Port Ather and we then made automatic guns illegal.. THE RESULT– NO MORE RAPAGE SHOOTINGS
IF you are American and u are disgraced and embarrased about the VT shooting (WHICH U SHOULD BE) do u best to ban automatic guns..
Apr.18 at 8:19 am
FLUD says:
Tim Duncan is gonna murder teams this year. I miss James worthy’s beard..made him look like a real tall Curtis Mayfeild. I wouldn’t think Nellie was being racist..Just old. Small line up could mean his ‘Downstairs team’ was goin’ small coz it can’t get big yadda yadda..
Apr.18 at 9:59 am
Dblizzy! says:
I’ve had enough of the racism talk on slamonline for now, let’s just dead that thought.
Apr.18 at 12:06 pm
Don Nelson's Penis says:
I’ve been feeling down on myself recently BADUMM–CHSHHHH
Apr.18 at 1:59 pm
Dan Maloney says:
What would negroes talk about,if it was not about race.Invent something,build something,find a black scientist and have him cure cancer.Stop blaming Whitey.Get Imus and Crawford reinstated,forgive them.Find new leaders,Sharpton and Jesse??Haaa.
Tell the gangs in the streets to stop bothering Whitey.And for heaven’s sake get jobs
because the Mexicans are proud people and they work.
Apr.18 at 3:12 pm
KILLAGORILLA says:
I’m sorry that my statement was improperly communicated yesterday, but I have to say that Dan Maloney is a total dumbass and he needs to wake up — it’s the 21st century for god’s sake!! Stop Hating , you fuckin idiot!!! Now, back to Basketball..
Apr.18 at 6:09 pm
James says:
Dan is just flaming people. No one carries thoughts that simplistic, its more of a lets see if i can get a reaction thing. Even if he thinks there is some kernal of truth in his own argument, the way he’s said it is in a way that makes people want to be upset. Its like that scene in diehard 3 when the criminal’s get Bruce Willis to wear that sandwich board that says I hate N@@@@@@.
Apr.19 at 2:09 am
Sesa says:
I wondered what Stephen “Whoo!” Jackson will done on a day-off between playoff games. Were there any good strip club in Dallas?
Apr.19 at 2:04 pm
Slobodan Chutzpah says:
Don Nelson’s New Suit: I hope you keep that name, it would be dope some weeks from now when no one remembers the actual incident anymore. That would be a delightfully obscure reference.
Apr.19 at 3:12 pm
Mike says:
Amen on your VA Tech comments. It never ceases to amaze/shock me how the media covers this sort of tragedy. Nancy Grace, of CNN, was portraying the university as irresponsible on the eve of the shootings–before the authorities and anyone else knew exactly what happened. This morning, first thing on the news is the showing of the videos this nutcase submitted to NBC! Can you imagine what a parent of child killed in this senseless slaughter would think seeing something like that???? Please give the famalies and friends of these young victims at least a little time to heal….
Apr.20 at 7:52 pm
Kilo G says:
Gilz is crazy this i mean has any 1 seen the adidas ads? thats the shit! and what happened at virginia tech didnt that crazy ass korean dude shoot his girlfriend in the morning of the biggest freaking college massacre of all time before he went to class, which was caught on camera and the freaking cops saw and didnt make the arrest(with plenty of time to arrest him anyway).comon the freaking shooting happened in late morining, yu couldnt get cops up to campus to hours before he shot like 30 people?this is some bull.F*ck tha police, your supposed to be protecting people not pigging on your fat asses,and thats to patrol cops only, im down with hazmats and swat.now michael moore gonna hav to make a movie about this, sh*t.
Apr.20 at 7:54 pm
Kilo G says:
sry correction on first sentence *this year.* sry
Nov.30 at 12:41 pm
SLAM ONLINE | » Links: NBA Friday says:
[…] Some of you Linkstigators might remember the name of Linkstigator Joel Kimmel. Joel is an illustrator based in Brooklyn, who once sent along this great Gilbert Arenas picture he’d created. […]