Links: The Bizarro NBA
When will Dirk go goth?
What the hell is happening right now?
And what kind of NBA are we watching when Antoine Walker and Jerry Stackhouse are alleged to be solid second options on Championship-level teams?
When I wrote the other night that there was a very real chance that both ‘06 Finalists could be sent home early, I was employing a bit of hyperbole — I didn’t really think that both Dallas and Miami could be sent home during round one of the Playoffs. And of the two teams, I especially didn’t think Dallas would lose. Miami, well, we all knew they had a tough season. And as old as they looked last season on their way to a title, they didn’t do anything to get younger this year, save for giving Jason Kapono a little more burn. Still, I figured after all the injuries they endured (from Shaq to Wade to even Pat Riley) this season, the Champs would find their footing, slow things down enough to turn the American Airlines Arena into a grindhouse and get past whoever they had to play in the first round.
But the Bulls exposed the Heat. Miami wants to play slow? Well, screw you. The running of the Bulls took just four nights to send the Heat back to Star Island for the summer. Miami particularly had no answers for Kirk Hinrich or Luol Deng. It should have been obvious that Pat Riley was regarding Deng lightly when he repeatedly stuck Ancient Walker on him, and Deng repeatedly scorched Walker each trip down the floor.
One of the more impressive things to me was the way the Bulls continually surged at the end of games. The Heat always seemed to start clicking in the second quarter, and the Bulls always seemed to absorb their run and then finish them off in the fourth.
Following the game four loss, Dwyane Wade said, “Last year was a storybook-written year, and this year was the opposite. A lot of bad things went on for us. But one thing I can say, everybody in here kept their head. We stuck together as a team, and that’s all that matters. We’ll always remember what we’ve done together, as a whole, no matter what.”
And now they’ll always remember how the Chicago Bulls whipped their butts.
Together, as a whole, no matter what.
Then there’s Golden State and Dallas. The Mavs won 82 percent of their games this season — basically, for every one game they lost, they won four more. That’s a terrific pace to maintain, but the Mavs did it over an 82-game schedule. Meanwhile, Golden State basically finished at .500 — for every one game they won, they lost another.
What does that mean right now? Absolutely nothing. Perhaps you’d think that, with such a large sample size available, these tendencies established during the season should hold true during the postseason. You would be wrong. You might also think that the Mavs would be a tough match-up for anyone during the postseason because of their ability to slow things down, play halfcourt basketball and run everything through their most valuable player, Dirk Nowitzki. You would be wrong once again.
The Warriors have officially swagger-jacked the Mavericks. Things were so bad in Dallas this morning that you can read the doom and gloom in Mike Fisher’s game four notes. The only way Dallas could look more dazed and confused on the floor would be if they had Adam Morrison. The Warriors are out there flying around, zipping all over the floor, while Avery stands on the side and shouts instructions that nobody is listening to.
In some ways, even though I was highly critical at the time, I think I understand now why Dallas tried to run with Golden State in game one. Golden State is basically playing read-and-react basketball — they move the ball up the floor, find an open guy and take the shot. No matter where the shot is from, if it’s open they shoot it. Dallas has a bunch of great players, probably a better roster 1 through 12 than the Warriors, so I bet Avery figured if they went small and allowed their guys to play the same style as Golden State, they would end up with better results than the Warriors. But it didn’t work like that. The Mavs were too tied to the way they played for 82 games (taking care of the ball, taking quality shots) to play streetball against the Warriors, and that bit of reticence was why they lost game one. Now the Mavs are back trying to play the way they played all season, but they can’t quite get the handle on it, so they’re almost stuck between two styles of play.
Right now the Mavs are like a kid with over-protective parents who spent one night at a friend’s house, their one friend with the parents who are really liberal. They stayed up late, ate a bunch of junk food, played video games, maybe even snuck out and ran around the neighborhood bashing mailboxes. Then the next morning they had to go back home to their strict parents. They tasted the wild life, probably liked the way it felt, and now they get can’t that experience out of their heads.
(Sort of like what happened to me and Sam on Saturday night in Vegas at All-Star.)
Maybe they need Tony Soprano and Phil Leotardo to come give them a talking to. Dirk really looks lost out there. I’m not sure he even knows the Playoffs have started. Dirk’s not even leading the Mavs in scoring during the Playoffs; that honor goes to Josh Howard. If this keeps up, Dirk’s going to dye his hair black and start wearing mascara this summer.
Besides their hot shooting, another thing that’s working in Golden State’s favor is the extended Playoffs schedule. During the regular season, the Warriors only had one player who played in all 82 games: Andris Biedrins. Baron Davis played in 62, Al Harrington played 42 and Stephen Jackson played 38 (because of a trade, really, but still), Jason Richardson played 51 games and Monta Ellis played 77. This was mostly due to the grind of the NBA season, all the back-to-backs and the constant travel.
But now all the back-to-backs are dunzo, and the Warriors have plenty of time to rest up in between games. After last night’s win, Nellie was even talking about shortening his rotation for the next few games so that he only uses six guys the entire game. Six! And he can get away with it because it’s the Playoffs.
How do you beat the Warriors? Good question. If I was Dallas I’d use my regular starting line-up. I’d tell Terry to walk the ball up the floor and use so much time that you can see grass growing out there. (Maybe not the best metaphor to use for JT.) I’d work the ball inside, try to get Golden State in foul trouble. Then I’d throw a zone defense at them. This seems counter-intuitive to the conventional wisdom that a zone doesn’t work against against shooting, but the Mavericks aren’t getting out to the perimeter fast enough otherwise, and a zone would position their guys closer to the three-point line. (Riley used this earlier with Miami against the Bulls and it was one of the few times the Heat made a run.)
One other thing that has jumped out at me has been the crowd reactions. If you didn’t think home court advantage means something, you should believe by now. Did you hear how quiet those fans were in Miami? How about in comparison to the maniacs in Oakland? Regardless of what the NBA might lead you to believe, the fans still matter.
Final thought here: Now that Baron Davis is wearing a hat with bullets in the hat band, I’m officially calling him Shaft.
• What else is going on? In honor of Man United basically sewing up the EPL this weekend, today I’m wearing my retro Tim Howard Man United goalkeeper jersey that Timmy gave me a few years ago when I was over there to visit him. It’s all black with these silvery things down the sleeves and it makes me feel like Spiderman.
• How about “The Sopranos” last night? Was that one scene disturbing or what? When you hear there’s a pivotal “shower scene,” of all the permutations you can dream of, nothing could top what happened last night.
• If Toronto loses to Jersey, does this give Bryan Colangelo the excuse he needed to dump Sam and bring in Marc Iavaroni?
• Quote of the postseason comes from Andrei Kirilenko: “I will bite a throat for my teammates.”
67 Responses to “Links: The Bizarro NBA”
Apr.30 at 1:59 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
The long drawn out series are annoying, but are the best possible thing for the Warriors, in particular Baron.
And my God that Oakland crowd…
Apr.30 at 1:59 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Lang, did you see the ManU-Everton highlights? Tim has pretty much played every game this season and been as good as any keeper in the Prem, but he couldn’t play yesterday because of that rule where guys on loan can’t play against “their” team — even though Tim recently signed a five-year deal to stay at Everton. Anyway, Everton played its third-stringer, who’s, like, 12, and after we were up 2-0, he decided to drop a corner kick, which pretty much opened the floodgates. Then ex-Red Phil Neville OG’d, and we were f*cked. Whether any of this qualifies as irony, I’m not sure; I DO know it’s interesting that, if your Reds win the league, we get a roughly $2 million bonus on the Rooney sale. So I guess it all works out in the end.
Apr.30 at 2:00 pm
TheBigDog says:
First
Apr.30 at 2:00 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Oh, and everybody can read about Tim Howard in the new issue of KING. And make sure you check out the fine piece of a** on the page with him.
Apr.30 at 2:09 pm
DubsGonDoIt says:
That pic of Baron wit bullets in his hat is the greatest thing ever!
Apr.30 at 2:10 pm
deestarbuckz says:
The series dominance of GSW has inspired me. I had to start playing Mac Mall- Illegal Business through the iPod.
Apr.30 at 2:16 pm
ALX8725 says:
how ironic that my two favorite sports teams are the Warriors and Manchester United. I started following United for everything the Warriors couldn’t provide…(winning) now look how life has turned out. Life is ironic.
Apr.30 at 2:33 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
agreed on Baron’s hat.
Apr.30 at 2:37 pm
Max Airington says:
“Maybe they need Tony Soprano and Phil Leotardo to come give them a talking to.” They did essentially sh*t in the shower last night. Gross.
Apr.30 at 2:41 pm
rob stewart says:
Golden State seems to be way more capable of doing more than just upsetting the Mavericks. They could possibly win it all.
Apr.30 at 2:45 pm
Joe_X says:
Sam Mitchell needs to be dumped, and this series hi-lights in dramatic fashion why this is true. He is being completely outcoached by Frank. He’s got no answers for NJ’s defence (NJ’s defence!). It took him 3 games to realize that Joey Graham was a liability. He has yet to figure out how to get Bosh the ball in the low post, and in the rare event that it happens, the rest of the players aren’t moving or spaced properly to help him if he’s doubled. Offensive rebounding? Non-existant - because Sam Mitchell apparently doesn’t realize that if he asks his best rebounder (Bosh) to be a mid-range jump shooter, then there won’t be ANYBODY under the rim to rebound. And what about Toronto’s defensive sets? How many post-ups of TJ Ford does it take to for Mitchell to realize that Kidd is having his way? I expected Vince’s streaky performances, and I expected the Raptors’ nervousness, but I didn’t expect (to this extent) how out-coached Toronto would get. The best part of it all was a Mitchell quote in the Toronto Star today, which I’ll paraphrase: “I’m not going to bother getting in to the details of why the butt-kicking happened with my guys…” Brilliant - Frank creates a great strategy to defeat his opponents, and when Mitchell gets a chance to respond in kind, he chooses to just not coach at all. Bye-bye, Sam. You were always useless, you just had a bunch of guys with heart on your team. I’m pretty worked up over this, and despite the randomness of this rant I’m going to post it over at the Series recap page, too.
Apr.30 at 2:46 pm
white hot eboy says:
Lang, if the Mavs lose this series do you think that same shower scene from the Sopranos will be played out by the Mavs too. I can see Stack & JT telling Dirk ” I can see you’re pus*y” and Dirk letting one out in a log in fear & disgrace.
Apr.30 at 2:48 pm
Darksaber says:
Screw Goth, time for Dirk to turn into Blofeld or some other serious villain. Not advocating injury, but Baron needs to get bodyslammed on his next foray to the hoop. Now if only Mavs had a guy in their roster with cojones, a guy who maybe, i don’t know, tackled SHAQ in the last finals and sent him reeling into the basketsupport, you know, someone like Jerry Stack… oh, my bad
Apr.30 at 2:48 pm
white hot eboy says:
How about, Dirk letting out a log in fear & disgrace. I think I’m still shook by the White Hot ass whippin.
Apr.30 at 2:52 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Baron been doin’ it forever. Remember one of T-Mac’s earlier playoff guarantees (2002) that got knocked off by two straight B-Diddy triple-doubles?
Apr.30 at 2:53 pm
jonathan says:
I think its two million pounds, innit? That would mean $4 mil US, obviously. Somebody give Phil the Man of the Match. And technically, although Howard had signed with Everton, he’s still on loan to United till the end of this season, so lucky for us reds. Can you tell I’m excited about the prospect of another treble year? Oh, and sucks for the Mavs. I still think they’ll pull it out, though. 3-1 GS?? I must be going crazy
Apr.30 at 2:54 pm
jonathan says:
Oh, and what happened to the little “Last week in La Liga” feature on the site? Nothing on the Maradona-like goal by Leo Messi?
Apr.30 at 3:14 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
@White Hot: You paint a terrifying mental picture. And Ryan and Jonathan: Saw the highlights and wore Tim’s jersey specifically because Man Utd won mostly because Tim didn’t play. I’m still trying to sign Timmy to my rebuilding of Nottingham Forest in FIFA 07 but he doesn’t want to play first division.
Apr.30 at 3:35 pm
Jack says:
You guys watch the wrong Premiership teams. Everton and Man Utd? Noo. Michael Owen is starting his first game for my Newcastle United since the last day of 2005. That’s where it’s at. The Newcastle fans atmosphere > any NBA atmosphere.
Apr.30 at 3:36 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Actually, jonathan, I thought it was a little over a million pounds, which is why I guestimated 2 mil U.S. As it is, I just looked it up, and it’s apparently closer to a half-million pounds. So, my basic math was right, I just got the original number wrong.
Also, I understand the loan rules, it just seems like they should go out the window once a player signs a deal with the new team. Whatever. I actually dislike you guys much less than I dislike, Chelski, so I’m happy for you taking the league. Well, I’m not happy for Shrek, but otherwise.
Apr.30 at 3:36 pm
JJ says:
Lang- As Braves fans we’ve seen our team pummel the League during the regular season, then crumble in the post-season. Now the Mavs are doing it too. I’m a big fan, you picked them to win it all. A bitter, bitter pill.
Apr.30 at 3:40 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Jack: Newcastle, of course. The fact that the highlight reel of the last barcode team to win anything runs in black and white says it all, no?
Apr.30 at 3:41 pm
dpak says:
dirk had better not get mvp.
Apr.30 at 3:42 pm
Ryan Jones says:
In fairness, Jack, I do like Newcastle BEER, and I am rooting for your underachieving squad to beat Reading today. Sadly, my squad’s UEFA Cup dreams may depend on it.
Apr.30 at 4:06 pm
JON says:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDaKAQLexVE
nets game interview with drunk bruce willis dunno where else to post it
Apr.30 at 4:10 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
@Jack: At least you’ll never walk alone. I became a Man Utd fan when they signed Timmy a few years ago. Since I didn’t grow up following the EPL, I didn’t want to just randomly pick some team and cheer for them. But I knew Timmy a little when he was on the Metrostars in MLS, and when United signed him I jumped in, even got a to go to a game at Old Trafford and hang out in the player’s lounge afterwards. Highlight was waiting with Tim for his car to be brought around after the game and standing there killing time with Roy Keane. Now that Tim’s on Everton I still root for him, but I’m sticking with United. I know it’s like cheering for the Yankees, but whatever. When you root for the Braves/Hawks/Falcons your entire life, it’s nice to have one big winner to follow.
Apr.30 at 4:13 pm
R7 says:
what’s da up and under for when the dallas lose to golden state, that avery goes into brithney spears mode??
Apr.30 at 4:14 pm
TripleDouble says:
South Auckland, New Zealand… street as. I love this!
I think SLAM may like it too??? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dp-2_0bSC50
Apr.30 at 4:17 pm
Tom Jackson says:
I’d really like to see the NBA take about 4 or 6 teams out of the leauge. The negatives are obvious and I don’t want to see any fanbase lose their team, kids, long-time supporters, etc. The NBA could close down the Sonics, Clippers, Grizzlies easily. If you shut down 4 teams that takes away about 60 players on NBA rosters, the talent is all watered down right now. We need to have 7 or 8 teams as loaded as the Suns and Mavericks and Pistons. I hate expansion. When I was a kid, I thought it was neat and exciting, new teams! New mascots and colors. But now, it’s obvious there’s just not enough quality players to fill rosters. Hey, I know this will never happen, but, it would definitely improve the quality of basketball we get to see, especially in the playoffs.
Apr.30 at 4:17 pm
TripleDouble says:
And as for Man U . . . I don’t reckon one Man U fan actually lives in Manchester, they all just jump on the (winning) boat, (although, to be fair, Lang has a dope reason though, seeing as he got down with one of their players, but Man U give me the sh*ts). . . It seems every Manculian is a City supporter, and that is dope! Their fans are so loyal.
Apr.30 at 4:20 pm
JZ says:
“probably a better roster 1 through 12 than the Warriors”– Lang, when are you gonna quit hatin’ on the Warriors? JT isn’t half the player Baron is. If he was remotely close, he’d be D’ing him up! Instead, you got Avery embarassing his own player Devon George w/ the assignment. B DIDDY FOR PRESIDENT!!
Apr.30 at 4:23 pm
StephenJacksonLovesOakland says:
it’s official… Baron has made Gangsta status with that dope hat. What better way to rep the murder capital of California than with bullets on your wardrobe?
Apr.30 at 4:38 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
@JZ: I didn’t say 1 through 5, I said 1 through 12. Do you really think the Warriors have more depth than the Mavs?
Apr.30 at 4:40 pm
Mr. 416 says:
DARKSABRE: I don’t know if it’s the guys on the roster….more like a product of D.Stern’s new Violence free NBA. Back in the day you come thru the lane one two many times and somebody would give you a tap. Mahorne, Oakley, Lambeer. Nowadays getting your amrs linked up in the post and you got to cut a check for 50,0000$ and MAYBE sit out a game for your transgretion.
Apr.30 at 4:41 pm
DubsGonDoIt says:
LOL now they just need to get S-Jax to show up in Dallas dressed like John J. Rambo.
Apr.30 at 4:46 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Lang, you know that’s Liverpool’s song, right?
Apr.30 at 4:48 pm
Bizzle McGrizzle says:
Baron Davis=Clyde Frazier, but more gansta
Apr.30 at 4:56 pm
Dizzle says:
Anybody see the Raps/Nets game when they interviewed Bruce Willis? I’m pretty sure Omar would say he’s Gangsta http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1khxVeDC-cY
Apr.30 at 5:00 pm
Dennis Taylor says:
The murder capitol of California? When did Baron start playing for Stockton?
Apr.30 at 5:24 pm
Lang Whitaker says:
Yeah…I thought he said he was a Liverpool fan. Ha! Sorry to get Jack…too many late nights watching these West Coast games.
Apr.30 at 5:27 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
Enough with all this soccer talk. The world cup was last year wasn’t it?
Apr.30 at 5:30 pm
DubsGonDoIt says:
Hey Dennis, Oakland had 148 homides in ‘06 & is the “murder capital of CA”.
Stockton had 38. Compton had more than Stockton did.. anyhow not a title I think anyone should be proud to claim.
Apr.30 at 5:40 pm
Ryan Jones says:
It’s a little early to get so salty, Khalid. Your Eagles won’t blow their playoff chances for a few more months yet.
Apr.30 at 5:45 pm
JZ says:
@ Lang: W/ the Warriors bench, you can count on guys to come out and play and most of the time they make significant impacts on the game. W/ the Mavs, besides Stackhouse- you’ve got guys that are solely role players…most of the time you don’t even realize they’re out there.
Apr.30 at 5:49 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
thats to easy ryan. i can’t get riled up about eagles talk in april. besides i’m pretty sure i saw tim howard in a mcnabb jersey. or was that rooney?
Apr.30 at 6:00 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
too easy i mean.
Apr.30 at 6:05 pm
Ryu says:
Stop comparing Stackhouse to Walker. It would be embarassing to any player in the L.
Apr.30 at 6:37 pm
jonathan says:
That’s just what the Mancs, say, that all Mancunians are City fans. It’s actually divided roughly in half (or so I hear- I don’t live there myself). Obviously United have the more global following, but I’m sur ethe 76,000+ Old Trafford faithful aren’t all from out of town. And Lang, I think we can safely say that Chelsea are the new Yankees of the EPL. And although I never really liked Tim Howard much, as a player (although I’m sure he’s a great guy and all) I enjoyed the article you wrote on him in that Striker mag a while back. Whatever happened to that, by the way? You guys got me all excited by coming out with what was essentially a soccer version of SLAM, and after two issues, nothing?
Apr.30 at 6:38 pm
jonathan says:
Oh, and my bad about the figures for the Everton deal, Ryan, I guess I heard wrongly.
Apr.30 at 6:46 pm
Jake Appleman says:
Anyone catch the first leg of Osasuna-Sevilla in the UEFA Cup? As Eminem would say if he watched la liga, “I’m A SOL-DADO”.
Apr.30 at 7:26 pm
IrvBX says:
mavs are scared becuase they know baron will get them real gangstas after them lol
Apr.30 at 7:36 pm
jonathan says:
isn’t the UEFA cup only on pay per view?
Apr.30 at 8:48 pm
SEALYboi says:
yea lang…whats up with striker mag????
Apr.30 at 8:50 pm
RedRum says:
Chelsea fan here… but I am on the bandwagon since Viali was the player-coach! Now I hate that egomaniac psychotic muppet Mhurinio that we have as a coach… granted… he won us 2 championships in a row, but his whinging about the refs really does me head in… Kudos to the team I support in Greece, Aris Salonica, who made it 4th in the league and a place in the UEFA cup straight from Div2!!! oh, Slam has to do a piece about basketball in Europe, the big clubs, Euroleague news and all… the bball level in Europe at the moment in dope, in 3 days the Final 4 is in Athens, all teams play amazing basketaball. you NEED to cover it buddies! Nick Galis… Nick Galis…. Nick Galis… Nick Gal….
Apr.30 at 10:22 pm
Bruno says:
hey lang i also thought you were wrong with that liverpool-newcastle thing, i’m a liverpool fan and i would like to see liverpool-manchester in the champions league finals just because i want the revenge for the premiership matches
Apr.30 at 10:43 pm
jonathan says:
wow….RedRum you are the first Chelsea fan I know to hate Mourinho. And yes, he does whine a lot. And Bruno, bring it on in the Champs league
May.1 at 12:21 am
Lang Whitaker says:
We actually did 4 issues of Striker…it did pretty well on newstands, better and better with each issue. Just tough to drum up ad support.
May.1 at 2:37 am
TripleDouble says:
@ jonathan. . . haha, really? Your probably right man, cause it was a mate of mine who told me that… who is a Manculian, and a City supporter. He has a hate for Man U that actually scares me a little.
May.1 at 4:00 am
Super Sonic says:
As arrogant as the Mavs are especially Cuban; I can say I’m enjoying every minute of the dismantling the Warriors are performing on the Mavs. For whatever reason people seemed to disregard the fact that the three games G’state won didn’t mean a damn thing. Most of the time it may not, but when you put together the fact that Avery Johnson is/was as student of Nelson during his Dallas years, and they run the same type of ball they run in the Bay Area. I gave the Warriors more than a puncher’s chance. Statistically the Mavs play good team defense, but they have been exposed for their terrible individual defense. They have absolutely no body that blocks shots or at least make Diddy, Ellis or any of the guards think twice about penetrating. I figured it would be an offense against offense series and Johnson is obliging to the tuteledge Nelson is giving him on how to really play small ball.
May.1 at 5:42 am
RedRum says:
See jonathan… I dislike him so much I dont even spell his name right…;) He is just not classy. I dont think there is a time that he lost and admitted his side was outplayed. Its either the ref, the schedule, the height of the grass, the composition of the goalpoasts…something.. really hate that…if you presenting yourself as this arrogant alpha-male type, be a gentleman and classy…Ferguson schooled him well with his interview over the weekend. I am happy I am winning 2 Champs, but look what ManU done, they won with class, fun football to watch, and a budget less than half from ours. Back to bball, Slam… you need to get you act sorted and promote Euroball. This is where real basketball is played…. *runs to avoid rotten fruit and veg thrown*
May.1 at 9:36 am
Ryan Jones says:
Khalid, I appreciate that you cared enough to ask Ben for a couple of soccer names. You’re coming around, man.
And I LOVE that this became a footy post.
May.1 at 9:38 am
Ryan Jones says:
Oh, and TripleDouble: Auckland’s Most Wanted, huh? One of the best/worst things about hip-hop is how easily it translates to other cultures. Those kids in NZ have all the wack gangsta-wannabe cliches down pat. That could be any suburb in the States…
May.1 at 10:40 am
oliver says:
we had the messi goal on las ligas last week- check it jonathan- its there (at the top- jake linked to it)
im gonna try and send over this weeks stuff soon-
May.1 at 10:42 am
oliver says:
we had messi’s goal in last week in las ligas- jake linked to it- this weeks stuff will be up soon(ish) jkae is swamped with the playoffs and im writin essays galore for university (3 in this week and an oral exam next week)
May.1 at 10:44 am
oliver says:
ok- so that didn’t go up first time - so i sent it again- wtf- u get the point
May.1 at 10:53 am
Ryan Jones says:
Oliver appears shook.
May.1 at 12:46 pm
oliver says:
shaken but not stirred mr Jones