46 Comments Monday, February 19th, 2007
Some Awards From The Weekend
Best and Worst In Show
Let’s be honest, last night didn’t really live up to the hype. And if you think about it, how could it have? Most of the guys were probably hung over, sleep-deprived, worried about having caught something that can’t be cured from one of the groupies, and tired of answering the same questions from the media. The majority probably just wanted to hit the craps tables one last time before going back to “work”.
This doesn’t mean the weekend, from a viewer’s perspective, wasn’t riveting. Because it was. Below I’ve compiled some awards for those who made it fun (and painful) to watch.
Worst Judging In A Dunk Contest Setting: MJ, ‘Nique, Kobe and Vince
Seriously, how does the Howard Sticker Jam get anything less than a 50? Most of the public’s wrath was saved for Mike and his ridiculously low scores, but I think ‘Nique got off too easily for not giving D-Howard the score he deserved considering Wilkins’ own forgettable experience with the judges.
Here are two new rules that I think should be instituted, and that would go a long way into making the dunk contest fun again:
1) The judges can only give out scores after having seen the dunk in slow motion replay. Most dunks happen so fast that it’s hard to truly appreciate them upon initial viewing; I know that I usually leap off the couch only after having seen everything twice or three times. There was no way for the judges to appreciate (let alone UNDERSTAND) what Howard had done without a couple of replays. The arena went silent after his dunk, just like it did in Oakland after Vince’s elbow dunk. Most people had no idea what happened initially, least of all the judges.
2) Screw this whole you-have-two-minutes-to-complete-a-dunk nonsense. If you can’t make a dunk in three attempts or less, take a seat. You shouldn’t even be competing.
3) I know I said two rules, but I don’t care: Nate Robinson is no longer allowed to be associated with the dunk contest in any way, shape, or form. Do you realize that he’s the main reason the last two contests have sucked so mightily?
Worst Dressed Human: Damon Jones and Craig Sager
These guys took things to a whole new level this weekend. I’m convinced that one of Sager’s suit jackets this weekend (on Friday I believe) could be seen from outer space. A man should never have that much glitter on his clothing unless his name is Michael Jackson and is still in the 80s.
(Damon Jones wore a maroon-colored jacket while interviewing celebs for NBA TV that made me long for that atrocious bright red jacket and sunglass combo from last year’s ASG.)
Most Disconcerting Celebrity Sighting: Carrott Top
Did you see how huge dude is? I’m sorry, but I’m not prepared to live in a world where Carrot Top’s arms are that big. I’m just not.
(Speaking of celebs, how does Adam Sandler get front row seats while Michael Jackson is told to take a hike? So let me get this straight: the guy responsible for “Thriller” is left on the outside looking in, while the one who brought us “Click” is treated like a VIP? Makes perfect sense.)
(While we’re here: I know everyone has mentioned it by now, but Wayne Newton is decidedly creepy. The guy’s face looked it had been left out in the sun for 72 hours. And whoever administers his Botox injections deserves a raise.)
Most Blatant Disregard Of The Laws Of Gravity: Monta Ellis
The guy threw down about seven dunks in the Rookie/Sophomore game, the last of which was absolutely filthy. I hope the League will have the good sense to extend him an invite to the dunk contest next year.
(Vince, Kobe and LeBron also had some nice dunks in the big game on Sunday. I’m now convinced that Vince plays with more desire in All-Star games than he does in certain regular season ones.)
Most Surprising Job Well Done By A Television Personality: Darvin Ham
First of all, I had no idea that Darvin was out of the League, much less that he’s now working for NBA TV. However, the guy did a commendable job whenever he was on the air throughout the weekend. He laughed a bit too much (and too hard) for my taste, but he kept the conversation moving along nicely and seemed to have a good rapport with the co-host.
(The announcers who handled the Rookie game were verbally slurping David Lee’s perfect shooting performance, but ignored the fact that he basically scored all of his points on DUNKS AND LAYUPS! Lee’s still my man, though.)
(While we’re dealing with TV personalities, does Kenny Smith’s defeat of Reggie Miller in their annual shootout take a little bit away from Reggie’s legacy? I’m just sayin’.)
Least Successful Attempt To Secure A Job: Scottie Pippen
The only positive to be taken from Pip’s appearance this weekend is that he’s at least not fat. He certainly didn’t look like someone who is ready to contribute significantly to a playoff contender. Then again, he was probably drunk and sleep-deprived like everyone else, so I shouldn’t be so quick to judge.
(Also, is it just me, or did Pippen look absolutely furious when team Chicago was eliminated for shooting out of turn? I thought he might punch someone in the head for trying to mess with his money.)
Most Obvious Display Of Intensity In An All-Star Setting: Kevin Garnett and Kobe Bryant
I couldn’t help but laugh after KG threw D-Wade’s layup attempt into the stands with extreme prejudice and that trademark scowl of his came out. I don’t think anyone told him this was an exhibition game.
Kobe also came out playing like it was game 7 of the Finals. I don’t think the guy knows how to take a night off. Last night, however, his brand of intensity was necessary. Everyone looked sluggish (especially the Eastern Conference), and were it not for Bryant, LeBron, Garnett and Amare playing hard, it could have easily turned into one of the worst All-Star games ever.
(This whole Kobe vs. LeBron rivalry seems to have some legs. They’ve now faced off three times this season, and each time there have been some great mano-a-mano battles. Call it a hunch, but I don’t think the NBA would mind a Lakers/Cavs finals too much.)
(This doesn’t qualify as an “intense” moment per se, but it’s too good not to be mentioned: T-Mac’s God Shamgod crossover early in the fourth quarter was nicely executed and completely fooled the defender. It’s too bad he couldn’t knock down the jumper.)
Best Use Of A Television Camera: TNT during Toni Braxton’s halftime set
Any time a television network positions their main camera directly in front of Toni’s crotch and thighs for the majority of her performance, I’m happy. Very happy.
Best Moment Of The Weekend: Push
It’s really hard to decide between the Shaq/LeBron/Howard dance off at the end of practice on Saturday afternoon, and the Bavetta/Barkley footrace later that night for the weekend’s greatest moment. So, I’m going to cop out and call it a tie. Both were hilarious, good-natured affairs that showed why the NBA is the most entertaining and self-aware of all the major leagues. Let’s see two people from the NFL lock lips on national television.
(Despite Shaq telling the Washington Post that he expects Kobe, LeBron or Wade to take his place as the League’s greatest personality, my money is on Dwight Howard. While some are getting tired of Gilbert’s act, I simply don’t see how anyone can’t enjoy Young Dwight at all times. It’s his world now.)
This entry was posted on Monday, February 19th, 2007 at 5:51 pm and is filed under NBA, All-Star 2007. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
46 Responses to “Some Awards From The Weekend”
Feb.19 at 5:56 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Carrot Top is the Axl Rose of props comedians.
Feb.19 at 5:58 pm
mutoni says:
amare was desperate for the mvp, but kobe’s performance was more well-rounded.
Feb.19 at 5:59 pm
namik says:
Actually KG whacked Wade cos Wade smacked(fouled) the sh*t out of him a couple of plays before. You could see KG was pissed right after that.
And was I the only one who thought Amare was going all out? Dwight too, although he was probably just pissed about the dunk contest.
Feb.19 at 6:01 pm
rob stewart says:
The most memmorable dunk I saw all weekend was the one T-Mac did in the NBA Street Homecourt video game commercial.
Feb.19 at 6:03 pm
namik says:
THANK YOU MUTONI! btw I totally agree on the Toni Braxton thing…
Feb.19 at 6:24 pm
jsutevan says:
Wade or Kobe…see what the world thinks… htt://www.thumbwarz.com
Feb.19 at 6:39 pm
Max Airington says:
I couldnt believe that Scottie was gloating after making that half court shot. Two WNBA players made it before him. Watching him come back is gonna hurt.
Feb.19 at 6:57 pm
Darksaber says:
You forgot the “thanks for bringing your carcass out to Vegas then forgeting to compete in the game itself” Award: to Dwyane. C’mon man, how you gonna let Mambiatch school you like that on worldwide cable tv. Arrgh. I hates me some Kobs, but at least he was on a mission. Wade just coasted, and coasted and turned everything over. Arrgh
Feb.19 at 6:59 pm
Darksaber says:
Oh and even Vince noticed carrot top when they cut to the mic camera, VC was pointing out how strange carroty looked. what a freaky sight
Feb.19 at 7:02 pm
Darksaber says:
After seeing the big Turbo&Ozone do his thing for the 16th time now, for me, that was the moment of this weekend. simply astounding skills for a seven footer who weighs that much, christ he even tried to execute the worm, but was slightly afraid of banging his knee on the ground, so he turned it into a floor hump hybrid. Shaq rules (still didn’t need to start though)
Feb.19 at 7:34 pm
Wizfan says:
what about gil joining the trampaline guys. Shaq gave 10,000 bucks to the zero to hero foundation for it I think.
Feb.19 at 7:45 pm
TheHype says:
Kobe also came out playing like it was game 7 of the Finals. I don’t think the guy knows how to take a night off. Well except for Game 7 of the first round of the playoffs…. I know we’re past that (cuz he’s a changed man now), but I’m just sayin’
Feb.19 at 8:22 pm
mavs-cavs fan says:
when shaq was playing PG against memo okur made my night
Feb.19 at 8:41 pm
paps says:
I was dissappointed with Lebron hogging it all night.
Feb.19 at 8:43 pm
mutoni says:
shaq does that every year. getting old. gilbert jumping off the trampo was insane; probably gave everyone connected to the wiz a collective heart attack. the guy simply doesn’t give a fuck, and we love him for it.
Feb.19 at 9:50 pm
Simmy Sosa says:
I liked Dwight boomin on Amare Stoudemire. Just a reminder Amare, there’s always someone bigger…
Feb.19 at 10:02 pm
Bonzi4Prez says:
Worst Replacement for an Injured All Star: Mehmet Okur instead of Zach Randolph!
Feb.19 at 10:14 pm
Drolfe says:
I agree with Dwight having potential to be the most entertaining dude in the league. Plus, yeah, him boomin on Amare was nice. He seemed to do it about 5 times. I hope that pisses Amare off and it creates the best rivalry in the history of team sports.
Feb.19 at 10:37 pm
DP says:
Monta…………………………….enough said. play wit it.
Feb.19 at 10:47 pm
Dan Marjele says:
Toni Braxton has a crotch now?
Feb.19 at 10:52 pm
DreDay says:
anyone have a link of the toni braxton halftime show?? anyone at all? sadly i was picking up taco bell at the half. my mistake.
Feb.20 at 12:53 am
Marie says:
Good way to wrap up the weekend: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vbFxZH9CIw
Feb.20 at 1:27 am
Basketball Revolution Podcast says:
The next step for Carrot Top is to take some time to deflate.
Feb.20 at 5:19 am
Boing Dynasty says:
ya, a good one.
Feb.20 at 5:31 am
Boyd says:
It seemed like at one point the teams traded about 4 or 5 baskets each, and they were all scored by Amare at one end and Dwight at the Other. Dwight got uncontested dunks, (sharp elbows, heavy arms, get out the way) whilst Amare got his on muscle-moves and three point plays. There is definitely a rivalry already here, Amare doesn’t wanna be supplanted as the next man-child. It would be a damn sight more interesting if the Magic were actually any good.
Feb.20 at 7:04 am
FLUD says:
GODDAMN NBA… That Ellis link is already gone. David Stern is a fat-grumpy-slimy-skinned-shitbag. Nate Robinson is just the last part.
Feb.20 at 7:43 am
Ben says:
Marcel…SLAM, put that Dwight Sticker in the next issue!!! PLEASE!!!
Feb.20 at 10:08 am
A_B says:
this all star weekend pretty much sucked from start to finish. The whole thing sucked a$$ ah well at least the breakdancing was funny to see. They should give them something to play for like home court adavantage for the team of the mvp in the ASG:P hahahaha wow that’s the most far fetched idea i’ve had today
Feb.20 at 10:18 am
Ben says:
…or like in baseball…
Feb.20 at 11:08 am
jerry hall says:
kobe and kg played the allstar with the respect that magic and mj gave to this game. guys who did not show up do not deserve their slots. for the east props to dwight and bron. melo had a good showing and deserves to start next year. my favorite moment has got to be wade’s layup being swattoonied by kg. wade is all about the whistle in my book
Feb.20 at 11:18 am
1hush D says:
Kobe was real hungry for that MVP b/c it is the only MVP award he can win….shh, don’t tell.
Feb.20 at 11:49 am
Aaron says:
Check the stats in games the Suns played against the Magic this year. Amare has owned Dwight thus far and is just a meaner player than him…
Feb.20 at 6:35 pm
joshybear says:
Kobe is the best player ever!!!!
Feb.20 at 9:41 pm
Ben says:
4 all ya!!! http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k138/bendreizehn/DwightSticker.png Greetz from Germany
Feb.22 at 10:50 pm
mike lafricain says:
i can’t belive how low they gave the sticker dunk,, mj shuld stick to playing not judging
Feb.23 at 10:21 pm
Eddynba8 says:
Errrrbody knows dat Kobe should be the m.v.p
Feb.24 at 3:11 am
NiCK says:
going for #4…first, 2007 all star mvp. Next, 2007 NBA finals mvp…`nuff said
Feb.26 at 3:30 pm
fiona barry says:
i hope dat da east win nxt year dey did’nt really play dat well no offence.but well done west ye played well enough to.hope dwyanewade gets it nxt year
Mar.2 at 3:25 am
gokillyourself says:
ALL STAR GAME WAS FUKKIN BORING
Mar.2 at 6:26 pm
James says:
The Howard dunk was amazing I can’t believe how low he scored
Mar.7 at 1:42 pm
hooper#3 says:
t-mac didnt give it his all cuz he aint tryin to get hurt..but at least check the stats..he did have 11 assits so nash wasnt really missed..and kobe deserved m.v.p. but i wanted shawn marion to win it since they were playing at his old college arena.
Mar.12 at 3:56 pm
pedrobob says:
dwight was un-natural, the east wud have had a chance if lbj passed the ball a bit more, kb was serious, probably the only person 2 be, but hey, someone has to be rite?
Mar.21 at 6:20 pm
Edo says:
Yo,whats up.I watched All Star West deserved win and KOBE was best.Check those dunks man.
Mar.21 at 9:47 pm
cant mess with kobe says:
kobe was ballin up and he was barely tryin
Mar.22 at 8:25 pm
John S. says:
it looked like amare wanted that MVP, but the best player in the NBA had to get it.
Apr.12 at 6:46 am
Dennis D. says:
to be honest, all-star weekend’s getting repetitious. If some things changed, it might be better. Props to The Big Ticket and KB24 for their effort. Same to Stat and The Matrix. All-Star ‘08 better be something to remember. Impact baby!!