Don’t quit your day job, superstar
Team USA is blogging away, and the results are exciting enough to put you in a coma.
Team USA blogs. The internet at it’s absolute most boringest. Thankfully these guys are all NBA players and this is just something they’re being forced to do at gunpoint. Let’s take a look at some writing samples:
Carmelo: “Right now, we’re going to take the scrimmage against Puerto Rico as a real game, but at the same time, we’re just looking to get better at certain aspects of the game and hopefully tomorrow we’ll see how our chemistry is as a team.”
Who is this and what have you done with Mr. Anthony?
Bowen: “It feels great to be back. You kind of dread that first day because you haven’t been around the ball – as far as team ball. You’ve been working out or whatever, but that doesn’t amount to what you do when you get out on the court and you’re playing defense against somebody else and things of that nature.”
Thanks Bruce. You’re playing with the best of the best and it sounds as exciting as running suicides on the first day of camp.
Hinrich: “The break went well. I think I just tried to get some rest and just get ready to come back out here. We’ve been gone for a long time. The break went well, I’m happy to be coming back and excited to be here. I tried to get some rest over the break. I just tried to take care of my body and my leg and get ready. There really wasn’t much going on except for just hanging out.”
Hey Kirk, how was the break? Did it go well?
Amare: “The communication between players is coming along great. Sometimes you have to remind yourselves to talk. So, that’s one thing we’ve been doing as a team is talking more and better.”
Yeah, but the communicating through your blog needs work. I’d be more interested to hear how it felt to have your dunk snuffed out by Chris Paul, who is a foot shorter than you.
Come on guys, give us something. Where’s that American swagger? The one and only Dream Team would never be this boring. Is it too late to get Ron Artest added to the team?
12 Responses to “Don’t quit your day job, superstar”
Aug.1 at 12:59 pm
mutoni says:
sam, don’t worry about it : there’s a reason they play the game and we write. it would be pretty funny if the nba forced some of the writers to play the game like they’re forcing the players to write about it. d-stern, holla back, homey!
Aug.1 at 1:46 pm
Hype says:
Man, I wouldn’t mind being “forced” to play in the L instead of writing.. As long as I’m also being “forced” a compensation “salary” …and I have no problems abusing quotes
Aug.1 at 2:29 pm
PIMPN says:
ron would be perfect on the team, tho i dont think the rest of the world would like that. stu jackson and others included
Aug.1 at 2:46 pm
dkosei2 says:
Ok, I know Amare is hurt and all but there’s no way in hell that Chris Paul is gonna snuff his dunk. No way! Where did you get that info from?
Aug.1 at 3:08 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
Here you go. A thousand words. http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/photo?slug=getty-71469905nb007_usa_prac_5_01_11_pm&prov=getty
Aug.1 at 3:56 pm
pete says:
http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/photo?slug=getty-71451649ab001_usa_prac_12_49_12_am&prov=getty dwade = shaq? look at the bicep….
Aug.1 at 4:22 pm
SwingMan says:
That’s right. Pick on the one photo of Amare getting sent back on a shot attempt - not a dunk - despite the fact that this is the first true (read: against non-waiver wire lifers), competetive ball he’s played in a year (those 3 games during the season were nothing more than a litmus test). You totally dismiss the guy despite the fact that he’s busting his ass coming back from injury, taking stuff totally out of context. Way to kick a guy when he’s down, Sam. I’d love to see your commentary after he’s back to his usual, dominating self - but I won’t hold my breath to see said comments for obvious reasons…..
Aug.1 at 4:34 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
Here. Does this sound like someone that wants to kick Amare when he’s down? http://slamonline.com/online/2006/07/the-fab-15/ After I wrote that I was sent the photo of Chris Paul blocking him. I say all the time that Amare’s injury is the worst thing for the game. I even wrote a whole I’m Just Saying about being depressed about it cause I thought he was back last year.
Aug.1 at 6:50 pm
SwingMan says:
Wow! In reference to this article as opposed to the one you linked to, do you make a beeping noise when you back up like that? Because you’ve totally flipped the script on Amare within the span of a week. Hey: At least you caught both ends of the spectrum. Can’t argue with that. Just personally, as a Suns fan (as if you couldn’t tell already), sick of the heaps of defeatest morons out there who are, not only predicting nothing but doom-and-gloom for Amare, but the legions of haters that actually want the kid to turn up as a permanent gimp. Oh: And if Larry Brown ever comes close to another basketball sideline, NBA or otherwise, I’ll puke.
Aug.1 at 9:12 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
I wouldn’t say I’ve totally flipped on Amare. On other things (Dipset, Eli Manning), yes. But not Amare. I mean, a 6 foot 1 guy did block his shot. Even if I thought Amare was the greatest ever, it happened. I understand why you’re upset though. It’s a sensitive issue. It’s like telling a Cleveland fan that LeBron is leaving.
Aug.4 at 12:04 pm
dkosei2 says:
A picture is worth a thousand tears…
Aug.6 at 9:44 am
Stevo says:
that shot was so low, anyone could block it.
i mean like, think maybe amare was like
“lets just take this easy” then thinking about the vegas strip joint like rasheed and went up for the deuce then recognizes he’s back in the NBA against the BEST NBA ballers. so damn, give the guy a break!