Mikhail Prokhorov to ‘Punish’ Himself and Get Married if Nets Don’t Win a Title Soon

In addition to being perhaps the most ambitious, Mikhail Prokhorov is the funniest NBA team owner in the League, by far. The big Russian quickly figured out how to deal with American media types and has become an unstoppable quote machine. Check out this Q&A with the NY Post for the latest from Prok: Q: Which actor would you want to play you in the movie about your life and why? A: ‘Chris Rock or Danny DeVito. For obvious physical resemblance.’ Q: Why are women so hard to figure out? A: ‘Who’s trying to figure them out? I think we just need to love them.’ Q: Describe your ideal mate. A: ‘Beautiful, smart, sexy and makes a mean bowl of borscht.’ Q: Is marriage something you would consider some day? […] A: ‘I have said that if the Nets don’t win the NBA championship within five years, I will punish myself by getting married. We are in year three. So no one is more interested in winning a championship than yours truly.’ […] Q: When do you expect the Nets to win an NBA championship? A: ‘In June.'”