Death: Only Way to Get Rid of Isiah
If James Dolan ever decides to fire Knicks head coach Isiah Thomas, he might want to think about using something other than a pink slip. Homicide, for instance, seems like a viable option. But hey, don’t listen to me, here’s Isiah himself with the helpful suggestion:
“I fight till I die,” the embattled Knicks coach said Tuesday after practice. “It’s not about giving up or quitting. To me it’s win or die, and I literally mean death.
I don’t mean walk away, I mean death.”
So there you have it, Knicks fans. Literal death is the only way to get rid of this guy. Fun!
Tonight, the Knicks host equally lowly Seattle (both teams might actually lose!), but the grieving Stephon Marbury is not expected to play.
66 Responses to “Death: Only Way to Get Rid of Isiah”
Dec.12 at 1:04 pm
white hot eboy says:
Any Linkstigators a good shot in the NY area? Shia, this could be your chance to channel your rage for the greater good?
Dec.12 at 1:09 pm
Candice says:
Well in that case there’s only one thing to do…
Dec.12 at 1:11 pm
Ryan Jones says:
From my comment on the Jamaal Tinsley post, Tuesday 6:22 pm:
“If I may return to my usual lighthearted sarcasm, Isiah today apparently said something about ‘coaching to the death,’ like he literally wouldn’t give up on these Knicks until he died. Note to disgruntled Knicks fans: This should not be viewed as an invitation.”
Dec.12 at 1:12 pm
Ryan Jones says:
The point being, that post was all about the very serious problem of young black guys shooting each other for no good reason. Irony!
Dec.12 at 1:14 pm
BETCATS says:
If he gets into your car call shotgun
Dec.12 at 1:18 pm
white hot eboy says:
Yeah, but Ryan, he’s WELCOMING death. There’s a difference.
Dec.12 at 1:19 pm
Harlem_World says:
Somebody call Karl Malone….
Dec.12 at 1:20 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
The end of the Isiah era is obvious. People always accuse him of being Machiavellian. He should fake his own death. This is a set-up for that event.
Dec.12 at 1:22 pm
white hot eboy says:
Pac probably has room in his villa in Brazil.
Dec.12 at 1:30 pm
Jared says:
haha sam…is james dolan suge knight?
Dec.12 at 1:32 pm
Captain America says:
Sam, Zeke is doing more than faking his death. He is killing the franchise.
Dec.12 at 1:50 pm
Tenorca says:
“And then, if I die, I’ll propose trades as a mummy. Suck my balls, New York.”
Dec.12 at 1:54 pm
vmcb says:
The Knicks’ new coach: Zombie Zeke.
Dec.12 at 2:04 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
I hope Kevin Durant scores 83 points tonight.
Dec.12 at 2:05 pm
Myles Brown says:
Id love to see it too, but he’d have to take 243 shots to do it. How could his FG% dip from .393 last month?! .333? Really?
Dec.12 at 2:05 pm
TADOne says:
Wax poetic, Zeke.
Dec.12 at 2:09 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
I’ll settle for him dropping 32 and the Sonics winning by 10. In fact, I’d rather have Damien Wilkins lead the way in the House That Gerald Squatted In.
Dec.12 at 2:13 pm
Chris O says:
A loathed GM in the biggest basketball city in the world getting taken out would make a great CSI NY.
Dec.12 at 2:14 pm
Co Co says:
LONG LIVE ISIAH!
Dec.12 at 2:15 pm
white hot eboy says:
To be objectionable to Co Co’s comment, “DIE ISIAH DIE”
Dec.12 at 2:15 pm
Chris O says:
Suspects include the 18,000 at the Garden whose chants of Fire Isiah, the woman he sexually harassed, the players he wouldn’t trade away, Jamaal Tinsley’s brother and Dolan himself, after his delusions hit an all-time low when Durant dropped 74 ponts on his team.
Dec.12 at 2:24 pm
riggs says:
finally i can put a good use to my M24 7.62-mm sniper rifle.
Dec.12 at 2:24 pm
TADOne says:
I actually think Durant could get 50 tonight, Russ. Think who would be guarding him : Quentin, Crawford, Balkman, or Lee.
Dec.12 at 2:25 pm
Bryan says:
I just wanna kick his ass not kill him.
Dec.12 at 2:26 pm
TADOne says:
Actually, Balkman is a decent defender….
Dec.12 at 2:28 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
But he’d foul out in eight minutes.
Dec.12 at 2:37 pm
white hot eboy says:
Maybe Isiah can be visited by three spirits on Christmas Eve. The ghost of desire and hunger, Patrick Ewing, the ghost of intimidation and swagger, Anthony Mason and the ghost of gulliness, Charles Oakley. After a few hours with those three, Zeke may be buying turkey’s for the entire city, let alone Tiny Nate.
Dec.12 at 2:38 pm
Holly MacKenzie says:
haaaaahaha
Dec.12 at 2:43 pm
white hot eboy says:
I’m glad I amuse you, Holly. I actually wish that would happen, though. A Christmas Carol has nothing on The Nightmare Before Knicksmas.
Dec.12 at 2:43 pm
underdog says:
It’s all the fans fault.
Dec.12 at 2:45 pm
h-town nick says:
Well played eboy. It might be easier to just get the real oakley to punch out isiah’s teeth. Without the disarming smile, he has no power.
Dec.12 at 2:57 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Someone wrote that Charles Oakley should absolutely be a Knicks assistant coach–and I agree. Who would dare turn in a half-assed performance with him sitting on the sidelines? But it’ll never happen because God forbid someone share Isiah’s spotlight.
Dec.12 at 2:57 pm
Chief says:
Someone needs to put a hit out on him.
Dec.12 at 3:09 pm
Candice says:
Good one Eboy.
Dec.12 at 3:14 pm
TADOne says:
I bet no one would play Oak in cards or dice.
Dec.12 at 3:21 pm
neaorin says:
The Knicks host Indiana on Monday, maybe Isiah can hit the town afterwards with Tinsley.
Dec.12 at 3:25 pm
Young Chris #3 says:
Isiah makes me laugh. Really.
Dec.12 at 3:33 pm
neaorin says:
Young Chris, yes, Isiah has been known to have that effect on people who aren’t Knicks fans.
Dec.12 at 3:46 pm
Jukai says:
THIS ISN’T FUNNY IN THE SLIGHTEST. Death is a serious thing. You’re talking about ENDING THIS GUYS LIFE! What the hell is wrong with you guys? I get it, Isiah is a bad coach, but what the hell did the man do to warrant death? Really, just disgusting.
Dec.12 at 3:47 pm
Jukai says:
Also, check the news item “ESPN asks the dumb questions” and get back to me.
Dec.12 at 3:48 pm
Jukai says:
I guess joking about Garnett blowing out his knee is horrible, but joking about murdering Isiah Thomas, nah, that’s coo’.
Dec.12 at 3:48 pm
Chukaz says:
I’m tellin’ all of ya, f*ckin’ Isiah Thomas is gonna pull a Larry Brown on the Knicks, man. He gonna get his and run.
Dec.12 at 3:49 pm
Jukai says:
On an entirely different note, the posts here are freaking hysterical.
Dec.12 at 3:52 pm
Chukaz says:
Jukai, who hasn’t fantasized about murdering Isiah Thomas? I haven’t, but that’s because I kinda hate the Knicks, but that’s just me.
Dec.12 at 3:55 pm
Chukaz says:
It was a d*ck move by ESPN to joke about KG f*ckin’ up his knee.
Dec.12 at 4:06 pm
Jukai says:
So, are you immensely retarded on purpose or is this really you?
Dec.12 at 4:07 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
The difference is that Isiah basically said that the only way he’s leaving is if he dies, and the New York fanbase—loyal that it is—wants to make sure he gets what he wants. Sooner rather than later. SIXTH MAN, BABY.
Dec.12 at 4:09 pm
Jukai says:
Right, death is a real funny subject Russ.
Dec.12 at 4:16 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
I didn’t say it was funny, I said that Isiah was the one who brought it up in the first place. Therefore it’s fair game. I don’t think anyone in here seriously wishes Isiah would die. Nor do I think anyone would have brought it up on their own.
Dec.12 at 4:17 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Unless I’m misinterpreting the quote, “I literally mean death.”
Dec.12 at 4:18 pm
Chukaz says:
@Jakai - did you just call me retarded you lil’ son of a b*tch? Oh, and death is indeed a really funny subject and if I were you, I wouldn’t mess with me. C*ck sucker.
Dec.12 at 4:20 pm
Jukai says:
Oh, I’m just playing Russ. I’d joke about Isiah being stoned to death by a crowd of New Yorkers all day. But I got a buncha crap about the ESPN/Garnett debacle, and instead of having people tell me “Garnett is a hard working player and he doesn’t deserve to be poked fun at that way” or “ESPN is a serious news organization and everything they say should be serious as to not confuse others of their opinion,” I get “IT’S NOT FUNNY TO JOKE ABOUT GARNETT BLOWING OUT HIS KNEE!” Then half of them come here and talk about Isiah being violently murdered. I just wanted to banter for a while. Carry on.
Dec.12 at 4:20 pm
Chukaz says:
I think that Knick fans would have eventually call for his head at some point.
Dec.12 at 4:21 pm
Chukaz says:
Go to hell Jukai.
Dec.12 at 4:22 pm
Jukai says:
Oh man, you got me there Chukaz!!
Dec.12 at 4:26 pm
TADOne says:
Stoned to death by the fans? Hmmm, jukai may be on to something.
Dec.12 at 5:14 pm
d.Y. says:
Russ, are you talking about the Marlon Wayans/Kadeem Hardison flick?
Dec.12 at 6:02 pm
Dutch Rich says:
Youth rears it’s ugly head. That being said I wish to apologize to my daughter and her entire Pre-K 3 class.
Dec.12 at 9:05 pm
Sesa says:
When Isiah really got killed, the whole town of New York probably don’t have alibis. Everyone could come up with different motives.
Dec.12 at 10:39 pm
Charles Horton says:
I had a dream lastnight about Isiah being sent to Guantanamo and being waterboarded. It was a really good dream, until it turned out that Isiah was a masochist. I think that my subconscious is trying to tell me that Isiah will find a way to rob Knick fans of their satisfaction, no matter what.
Dec.12 at 11:06 pm
Pat Is Five says:
it could be worse for the Knicks. Stu Jackson and his 1.5 eyebrows could take over again and sign Ike Austin for 5 gajillion dollars.
Dec.13 at 1:48 am
Jukai says:
… it could not be worse for the Knicks. Really.
Dec.13 at 2:38 am
Russ Bengtson says:
The heck with waterboarding, they should move all the prisoners from Gitmo to MSG. Ve haf vays of making you talk.
Dec.13 at 4:31 am
LAN says:
curry 4 allstar
Dec.13 at 4:35 am
LAN says:
isiah would be remembered as a great player if he didnt coach, but he did coach so hes gunna b remembered as the worst coach of all time.
Dec.13 at 4:35 am
LAN says:
agree much? AGREE ALOT