What a Guy
One of these things is not like the other. At all.
There is a guy who writes about sports. I’m told he sometimes writes about basketball, and that when he does, he often writes about the pro basketball team in Massachusetts. This team would seem to be his point of reference for everything else in basketball, which, you know, is fine. I guess.
Anyway, in his most recent column, the guy wrote about Greg Oden’s apparent season-ending knee surgery. In doing so, he referenced that team in Massachusetts. Specifically, he compared Oden’s knee surgery to the deaths of Reggie Lewis and Len Bias.
No, seriously. He did.
In fairness, the guy did write that Oden’s knee surgery is “not as tragic because nobody died,” so I guess he can’t be accused of lacking perspective — something one might otherwise be tempted to accuse this guy of, seeing as how he just compared a guy having knee surgery to two guys dying before their 30th birthdays.
Just wanted to let everybody know.
99 Responses to “What a Guy”
Sep.14 at 9:19 am
mutoni says:
rosey, charley. (what do i win?)
Sep.14 at 9:19 am
white hot eboy says:
Is it your dad, Ryan? Or another relative?
Sep.14 at 9:21 am
mutoni says:
no, i think it’s his buddy hench.
Sep.14 at 9:22 am
Ryan Jones says:
There is a GUY who writes about SPORTS.
Sep.14 at 9:24 am
white hot eboy says:
Yeah, but Ryan, Bill S. has always been an idiot? Why is this any different?
Sep.14 at 9:25 am
Ryan Jones says:
Because it’s Friday?
Sep.14 at 9:26 am
Slobodan Chutzpah says:
Obviously it’s Simmons. I do admit to reading him, but he often does come off as a bit of a self-important twat. I guess that whole OTT thing is part of his shtick, but he takes it too far at times.
Sep.14 at 9:26 am
white hot eboy says:
Oh yeah.
Sep.14 at 9:27 am
Keith says:
Was the guy who wrote the column Stephon Marbury?
Sep.14 at 9:27 am
H to the izzo says:
Not only is Bill an idiot but he has one of the more punchable faces in the world
Sep.14 at 9:32 am
Keith says:
Is there no link to the article itself?
Sep.14 at 9:35 am
Slobodan Chutzpah says:
He does have a punchable face. It’s also funny how he tends to portray himself as someone who could “take” a lot of guys and had a plethora of girls in college. Just by looking at his face I’m willing to bet he might be a bit of a p***y and would probably run when faced with such a prospect. As for those girls… Have you taken a look at that constantly flustered face? And I really don’t even care - I’m not into that whole machismo thing. It’s just funny to me how chooses to represent himself.
Sep.14 at 9:38 am
Adrian says:
Hahaha, has anyone ever listened to his podcast? His voice reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where George said he hated listening to himself on tape because “my voice always sounds so high and whiny”.
Sep.14 at 9:39 am
H to the izzo says:
He’s probably around 5′2′’ and hugely overcompensating.
Sep.14 at 9:44 am
Ryan Jones says:
Keith: No.
Sep.14 at 9:46 am
Keith says:
Ryan: Why?
Sep.14 at 9:47 am
H to the izzo says:
Keith:For obvious reasons
Sep.14 at 9:49 am
Keith says:
H to the izzo: Fair enough.
Sep.14 at 9:51 am
Ryan Jones says:
As a matter of principle, Keith, and because the website in question does not need my help in attracting page hits. I trust you can find it on your own.
Sep.14 at 9:51 am
mutoni says:
self: i like this game.
Sep.14 at 9:51 am
white hot eboy says:
Izzo, is a man having a punchable face equal to a beautiful woman have a pumpable a*s? Sorry Holly, it’s a research question?
Sep.14 at 9:53 am
Keith says:
Eboy, do I sense some s*xual chemistry between you and Holly?
Sep.14 at 9:53 am
Keith says:
And you and Izzo?
Sep.14 at 9:57 am
H to the izzo says:
If Eboy wasn’t a married man I’d be pretty scared.
Sep.14 at 9:59 am
white hot eboy says:
Probably me and Izzo more. Holly is to Canadian for me (meaning she sounds like a bad-ass that would whip my ass for no apparent reason). I am all about respect for a basketball minded woman. That’s why I like Cheryl, Co Co, jay and Ryan so much. Plus I feel bad for her that she has to read our stupid comments over and over.
Sep.14 at 9:59 am
Keith says:
I fear he has an ‘Izzo sim’ and gets him to do rude things with his ‘eboy sim’.
Sep.14 at 10:00 am
Keith says:
Our stupid comments?! Admittedly my last one wasn’t thought through and instantly regrettable but still…
Sep.14 at 10:00 am
Keith says:
You’ve changed Eboy; you used to try to be cool..
Sep.14 at 10:01 am
Keith says:
I think I’ve become the new BETCATS. For shame.
Sep.14 at 10:01 am
white hot eboy says:
Keith, I’m not that computer savy. If I was, my “sim” would look more like Rhianna in just a SLAM t-shirt and nothing else.
Sep.14 at 10:02 am
white hot eboy says:
Keith, does that bring my coolness factor back up?
Sep.14 at 10:05 am
H to the izzo says:
*Hoping Eboy doesn’t know what I look like so he doesn’t get any sim ideas*
Sep.14 at 10:08 am
white hot eboy says:
Izzo, I have that guide to use from the Educting Eboy post you made. Tight cropped hair, long & lean. Getting close, Izzo?
Sep.14 at 10:10 am
Keith says:
Your rating will only go up if you make one of Ryan and make him g*y.
Sep.14 at 10:10 am
white hot eboy says:
Izzo, plus, didn’t you say you resembled Ryan in a way? Let me go back to that post and let me get another look-see.
Sep.14 at 10:11 am
white hot eboy says:
Keith, that was kinda of covered with his Simpson’s image. Sorry Ryan.
Sep.14 at 10:16 am
H to the izzo says:
I resemble Ryan in the way of being white,pastey and have black hair.I am divulging too much
Sep.14 at 10:17 am
Ryan Jones says:
I feel so, so sorry for all of you.
Sep.14 at 10:18 am
Keith says:
Ryan Jones=Waylon Smithers
Sep.14 at 10:19 am
Keith says:
I’m so sorry for ever bringing ‘The Sims’ to the table. Ban me. Ban me now.
Sep.14 at 10:20 am
white hot eboy says:
To change topics, (god, why am I doing this) did anoyone see the WNBA game last night? I have to say that every game I’ve watched in this series (games 1,3 & 4) have been pretty entertaining. Last night’s game had actual tension and excitment. Plus I like to watch Laimbeer on the sidelines look like he’s going to cry on every whistle, kind of just like he did when he played.
Sep.14 at 10:21 am
H to the izzo says:
I don’t believe I’ve ever played a PC video game.Do the come with acne and pocket protecters?
Sep.14 at 10:22 am
white hot eboy says:
Ryan, you put in your quota for the week. Go away. Let us revel in your greatness.
Sep.14 at 10:24 am
white hot eboy says:
Izzo, that brings up memories of South Park and the World of Warcraft episode.
Sep.14 at 10:28 am
Keith says:
The WNBA has improved in leaps and bounds. It’s actually quite rewarding watching a new league evolve, seeing it from the very beginning.
Sep.14 at 10:28 am
H to the izzo says:
Yes Eboy disturbing and funny,just like South Park itself
Sep.14 at 10:29 am
white hot eboy says:
Are you being serious Keith or am I walking into a landmine-infested comment?
Sep.14 at 10:34 am
Keith says:
Serious comment mate. I sense I am about to be ridiculed…
Sep.14 at 10:35 am
H to the izzo says:
I am lucky to get coverage of the NBA so I can’t comment at all on the W kind
Sep.14 at 10:39 am
white hot eboy says:
No ridicule Keith. Izzo, I believe that most of the girls in the finals would put an as*-whipping on you. I’d take Taurasi over Izzo in a 15 to 8 final score blowout.
Sep.14 at 10:40 am
Adrian says:
Slow day?
Sep.14 at 10:43 am
H to the izzo says:
I’d take Taurasi over Izzo by 15-0,I mean she is a pro
Sep.14 at 10:45 am
white hot eboy says:
You’re sorry. Shut out by a chick, not orange, pastey, what’s next?
Sep.14 at 10:49 am
H to the izzo says:
Being pastey is sad but nowhere near as sad as being a melanoma tan-bed freak.Diana would bust your ass.Maybe I should give up altogether
Sep.14 at 10:50 am
Hisham says:
does this mean greg oden’s knee OD’d on cocaine at its draft day party?
Sep.14 at 10:50 am
Ben Osborne says:
I like Ryan’s columns better when he writes about people that play basketball.
Sep.14 at 10:51 am
white hot eboy says:
Hi Ben.
Sep.14 at 11:02 am
Ryan Jones says:
I’d argue that at least I “fought up” this time, Ben, but I’m not sure that’s actually true.
Sep.14 at 11:45 am
Sam Rubenstein says:
I was disappointed that Simmons admitted Belicheater was wrong for spying. He should have done it the Patriot way: with defiance, blame everyone else for being jealous, then claim disrespect.
Sep.14 at 12:37 pm
Kevin Wilson says:
Glad he took the time from the “Parental Control” marathon on MTV to be bothered to write about sports.
Sep.14 at 12:59 pm
Ryan Jones says:
One of the many benefits of how little TV I watch these days is that I have no idea what Kevin is talking about.
Sep.14 at 1:12 pm
white hot eboy says:
Ryan, believe me, you would HATE “Parental Control”. Think, your parents, picking two new girls to go on a date with you to try and steal you away from your annoying, nasty current girlfriend. And they watch the whole moronic proceedings from your living room.
Sep.14 at 1:17 pm
Donn says:
I gotta admit, i enjoy the Sports Guy columns but that article about Oden was pretty ridiculous. The dumbest thing he wrote, besides comparing Oden’s injury to Reggie Lewis and Len Bias death, was when he wrote that he knew Durant was better than Oden because at the ESPY awards Durant moved better in normal clothes than Oden. HUH???!!! Anyways, all in all, i think the guy is pretty funny. Yeah, all his “I love everything Boston” can be a little much but then again he use to be known as Boston Sports Guy or something like that, so what do you expect. I mean unlike other columnist from Boston who take them self wayyy to serious (i.e. Bob Ryan, Dan “the man perm” shaugnessy) at least the “guy” seems funny. Besides, you have guys who write for this site and magazine who incessantly talk about Atlanta teams that most people barely care about but then again, Lang has never compared anything atlanta sports related to a death….yet.
Sep.14 at 1:51 pm
jbn74sb says:
A couple of thoughts:
First, in case anyone missed it, eboy just confessed to not only watching the horse races, I mean the WNBA, but also to enjoying it. We can’t be friends any more.
Second, regarldless of what you think about Simmons, he is consistently entertaining, and is probably the most widely read “journalist” of his kind. Does he have a schtick? Of course. Don’t we all? Are some of the things he says way off base? Of course.
Third, I would pummel Taurasi.
Sep.14 at 2:02 pm
John D says:
Ryan’s salty cause Simmons is actually funny unlike 95 percent of Ryan’s stupid-ass comments on this site.
Sep.14 at 2:03 pm
Paul says:
Who was the guy on the KING/SLAM staff who dunked on Taurasi but followed that by losing the game?
Sep.14 at 2:10 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
Frat Guy is the worst.
Sep.14 at 2:21 pm
Ryan Jones says:
All this time I thought I was salty because of the high sodium content.
Sep.14 at 2:25 pm
white hot eboy says:
Bodie, you liking Simmons is par for the course. Two idiots, with idiotic views. Me liking the WNBA for a few games in their Finals shows range of depth. Plus, I’d rather watch women’s basketball than Marlins baseball. You pummeling Taurasi in a sentence would look like this in a sentence “Diana caught me on a bad day. My legs weren’t right. I had to take her to Nobu for dinner since she put my ass in a shock-induced coma”.
Sep.14 at 2:26 pm
white hot eboy says:
Excuse the double word grouping.
Sep.14 at 2:31 pm
jbn74sb says:
There is WAY too much on TV to ever even consider watching the WNBA. This is an unforgivable offense eboy. I’m deleting you from my myspace page.
Sep.14 at 2:32 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Paul: That was Aggrey.
Sep.14 at 2:37 pm
white hot eboy says:
Thanks Bodie.
Sep.14 at 2:38 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Bodie, I swear to Jesus that I don’t find your boy entertaining, and generally never have. I appreciate he’s got a big following and a lot of people think he’s funny, but then, the same could be said for Dane Cook. Lots of people are entertained by American Idol. Lots of people voted for George Bush (twice!). Taste is a motherf*cker.
Sep.14 at 2:44 pm
jbn74sb says:
Ryan, I’m with you on Dane Cook. As for the Sports Guy, I must admit that I enjoyed reading him much more about 5 years ago, and do so now as much out of habit as anything.
eboy - Do you think you could average 10 ppg in the WNBA?
Sep.14 at 2:48 pm
white hot eboy says:
If I couldn’t average 10ppg in the lig, I’d be dissapointed (well at least about 10 years ago). That said, I’d be like Juwanna Man in the WNBA. MVP, blond wig piece, 38 points per game. Those broads would get rolled.
Sep.14 at 2:48 pm
Paul says:
If Jbn was indeed talking about beating Taurasi one on one and not banging her, my money is on DT 15-5. And there is a huge difference between saying something wrong once in a while and comparing a bum knee to people who died tragic deaths.
Sep.14 at 2:51 pm
Ben Osborne says:
Bodie’s hatred notwithstanding, last night’s WNBA game was pretty exciting. I’ve loved how Taurasi plays since she was a freshman in college. Aggrey was definitely impressed with her in that 1-on-1 game for KING (the story about which I was the editor for). As for BSG, I found him laugh-out-loud funny when he was independent on digital city Boston, and I enjoy his NFL picks columns to this day. He’s gotten less funny as he’s aged and been neutered by ESPN, but either way, I don’t see why we’re debating him on our site. Of course, Ryan Jones has a very independent streak.
Sep.14 at 2:53 pm
white hot eboy says:
Paul, I had the same thoughts about the pummeling Taurasi comment.
Sep.14 at 2:56 pm
Ryan Jones says:
If Ben Osborne were “The Man,” I would say something about The Man always trying to keep me down.
Sep.14 at 2:56 pm
Ryan Jones says:
But he’s not. Just so that’s clear.
Sep.14 at 2:57 pm
Ben Osborne says:
Also, I was going to save this for the WNBA column that Adrienne Goodson may or may not put up today, but here’s a tidbit:http://sportsmediawatch.blogspot.com/2007/09/wnba-finals-surging-towards-stanley-cup.html
In short, WNBA ratings stink, but not much worse than hockey’s or soccer’s.
Sep.14 at 2:58 pm
Ben Osborne says:
I’m the man next to the man, Ryan.
Sep.14 at 3:00 pm
white hot eboy says:
Thank you Ben, for agreeing that the WNBA game last night was worth a watch.
Sep.14 at 3:02 pm
jbn74sb says:
eboy and paul - They don’t make that much beer. Besides, I like asian girls. I’d make an exception for Erin Buescher, who was at UCSB while I was there. And no hate Ben - the highlights on the follower made it look like a good game, with the added benefit of seeing Karl Malone on the sideline. Apparently it’s not hunting season…
Sep.14 at 3:07 pm
white hot eboy says:
Taurasi is Fergiliscious in face, no doubt, but I bet she’d ride you out into the LA night for hours.
Sep.14 at 3:26 pm
Donn says:
Ryan, Bill Simmons is funnier than Dane Cook.
Sep.14 at 3:37 pm
Ryan Jones says:
I’ll go ahead and agree with you, Donn. Does that prove anything either way?
Sep.14 at 3:44 pm
Russ Bengtson says:
I’m funnier than Dane Cook. Comparing someone’s humor to Dane Cook’s is like comparing some league’s TV ratings to the NHL’s. Whoops!
Sep.14 at 4:04 pm
d.Y. says:
still don’t get the Sports Guy hate. He writes a lot of stupidness, but so do we all. Find balance. Y’all cats act like you’ve never had that white friend who is funny and sensible sometimes, and then suddenly blurts some horrid idiocy at others. And one mo gin, the WNBA can be dope just like the NBA can suck. At least they can get the right teams in the finals.
Sep.14 at 4:10 pm
Tarzan Cooper says:
at least greg cant die before his 30th birthday, he’s already way past that.
Sep.14 at 4:46 pm
Ryan Jones says:
I don’t follow you, dY — I pride myself on not having white friends.
Sep.14 at 5:41 pm
Donn says:
Ryan, what where we trying to prove?
Sep.14 at 9:05 pm
ForzaMilan says:
In Simmon’s defense he was saying that both events hurt franchise morale in a similar way. I think you guys have decided to take his words at face value and just call Simmons a fool because it’s cool.
Sep.15 at 4:36 am
Eoin says:
ForzaMilan’s a genius.I read 94 comments and it took the ninetyfourth for anyone to point out that Ryan’s just deliberately taking this whole thing out of context so he can get another dig in at Simmons.The point Simmons made was reasonably valid.This kind of taking a point out of context and berating someone for it is as bad as anything Simmons has done.
Oct.19 at 3:51 pm
perkisabeast says:
You guys are talking about me right? I compared losing the lottery to Len Bias.
Feb.21 at 5:35 pm
H to the izzo says:
Ben Wallace
Feb.27 at 11:04 am
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Feb.27 at 11:05 am
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