Mar.5 at 12:11 pm

Lang Whitaker says:
First!

Mar.5 at 12:27 pm

Elvis says:
HAHAHA…GOOD ONE LANG!

Mar.5 at 12:29 pm

Lazy Lew says:
sloppy Seconds!…….
ayo I been through wat adam thinkin right now, sadly i been exactly wat he’s goin through….
he’s thinkin,”Damn why is my undershirt so tight?!?! I told mommy xxxxl!I got it!!! i’ll give them my walter Herrmann pose to covr it up.”
young fab AKA LOSO out APRIL 17 sukassssssssssss

Mar.5 at 12:44 pm

Danny Ferry says:
” Ohhhh I can see my reflection in the camera lens, should I look happy or rugged? Yeah rugged, political martyrs never smile, and they get the chicks. Man thats a nice ’stache Adam, its too bad girls don’t like ’stache’s anymore. Does this ball feel like a boobie? Man its been a long time since I touched one….or is it like a bag of sand…probably not a good thing I forget. Wow do my shoulders look good, very McHale like…..but classier, kindof like an expensive refrigerators box…..don’t smile dont smile dont smile dont smi….”

Mar.5 at 12:47 pm

Cub Buenning says:
So there’s Josh Heytvelt and the Fungus but I’m Spokane’s Most Wanted?!?!

Mar.5 at 12:48 pm

1hush D says:
Scooby dooby doo….. -”If Karl Marx could see me now” -Viva Revolution! -Viva Red Jesus! -Big Boys do cry. “This here in my hands is the real opium of the masses” -”Groovy man, let’s play some ball”

Mar.5 at 12:49 pm

1hush D says:
“free moustache ride” is that clean?

Mar.5 at 12:51 pm

Aaron says:
“Hold me closer tiny dancer…”

Mar.5 at 12:56 pm

Andy says:
“Hanging out…down the street…the same old thing…we did last week…not a thing to do…but talk to you…we’re all alright…we’re all alright!”

Mar.5 at 12:56 pm

Lang Whitaker says:
Good one, Aaron. You too, Danny Ferry.

Mar.5 at 1:02 pm

Linda says:
“Last one, right. Heard that before. There’s an XBox in my room, calling my name. Adam… Adam…. come kill people on Halo Adam…. Wonder if I have to keep doing stupid photoshoots like this one now. I just wanna play. They want me to smile? Yeah, right. Just the image I need to project. Friendly. This is friendly enough. I’ll smile when they’re finished.

Mar.5 at 1:12 pm

Cregg says:
Would it be funny if i pretended a shark had my legs, nah dont be stupid, do the stairs, go lower and lower…..

Mar.5 at 1:15 pm

nic says:
“i can see through time…”

Mar.5 at 1:20 pm

DBlizzy! says:
“I know what your thinking: ‘That Morrison kid has the sweetest stroke and the sweetest porn stache too boot.’ And while those things are true, there’s more to the man than what meets the eye… well not really. Just look at me. Hair, impeccably cut just above the shoulders. Collar, slightly unbuttoned as if to say ‘Yeah I’m casual, but sophisticated as well.’ Fingertips, manicured to perfection, firmly but gently grasping the basketball. And the porn stache, well that just speaks for itself.
Envy me b*tches, it’s ok, if I wasn’t me, I’d envy me too. It’s not easy looking this good, BUT LOOKING GOOD IS MY JOB, basketball is what I do on my day off.”

Mar.5 at 1:26 pm

Phil B says:
Dang yo, this contest sounds like fun and all, but do I really want an Adam Morrison t-shirt? I live in the NW and all, but where could I wear this? Aren’t we done with this whole ironic t-shirt thing yet?

Mar.5 at 1:32 pm

Ken says:
I know you can hear my thoughts… meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow mya meow meow meow meow… (to the tune of meow mix).

Mar.5 at 1:39 pm

NAS says:
“what were we doing here again?”

Mar.5 at 2:01 pm

J-Bird says:
“This ball feels like its melting to my hands, and every time the photographers flash goes off a vivid display of colors dances before my eyes.Stay Focused, no happiness, ive got to erase everyones crying memories!

Mar.5 at 2:02 pm

coach says:
‘ gosh , i look like john holmes in this pose . growing up , john holmes was my idol ‘cept i don’t have a 12 footer only a 25′ jump shot ‘

Mar.5 at 2:12 pm

Derms says:
Mom! Make us some meatloaf! Where the **** is my meatloaf? MOM?!?

Mar.5 at 2:19 pm

bko32 says:
“I may run and hide
When you’re screamin’ my name, alright
But let me tell you now
There are prices to fame, alright
All of our time spent in flashes of light All you people can’t you see, can’t you see
How your love’s affecting my reality
Every time I’m down
You can make it right
And that makes me larger than life”

Mar.5 at 2:32 pm

NIKEY says:
‘ make sure that’s not a full body shot .you know damn well i’m not wearing anything down there ! ‘

Mar.5 at 2:32 pm

Isaac says:
“Why does the camera keep asking me if I’m stoned?”

Mar.5 at 2:34 pm

FLUD says:
“Goddamn orange..I reckon I look much better in these colours. Hmmmm, wonder if they’ll change it up soon. I’ll be a bobcat for a while… Mike hasn’t done a thing in years, ‘cept get fat. Oh man I’d love to have a chance of sayin’ it to him without gettin’ beat like crazy…”

Mar.5 at 2:35 pm

Aaron says:
Thank you kindly Mr. Whitaker. You know he’s rockin the Elton John before games.

Mar.5 at 2:39 pm

Tariq says:
“Indeed, although I recognize the significance of the memory that is palpitating in the depths of my being, I cannot capture it. What has triggered this sudden flood of sensation? Perhaps the texture of this basketball has overlapped into a long forgotten moment in Spokane? No…Could it be this elegant camerawoman’s delicate neckline? V-neck. V. Victory. Hasta la Victoria Siempre. My days at Gonzaga… But what could be so meaningful as to cloud my mind now? Perchance…Perhaps this blue, pinstriped affair resembles something I wore one day in Casper, when my mother gave me tea and cakes, and the swirling of the crumbs in the hot scented–” Flash “–…I wonder when the new Slam’s coming out. Also, I need to stop reading Proust.”

Mar.5 at 2:39 pm

Nadav Mor says:
nice billy madison reference, Lang

Mar.5 at 2:39 pm

Chris says:
“JJ Redick ain’t got sh*t on me”

Mar.5 at 2:41 pm

DeVAndrei says:
“Damn, i hope they dont make me look like Greg from Everybody Hates Chris!”.

Mar.5 at 2:41 pm

Tariq says:
“Just a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down/medicine go dooown/ medicine go down/ Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down/ in the most de-lightful waaaaaaaay!”

Mar.5 at 2:43 pm

Tariq says:
“Will Emeka notice that I told him I got 20s when they’re actually 18s?”

Mar.5 at 2:43 pm

Tariq says:
“Emeka, Uma…Uma, Oprah…Oprah, Emeka”

Mar.5 at 2:56 pm

blake wright says:
“Man, it’s a good thing this shirt is long enough to cover up the fact that I’m not wearing pants! Who’s that reporter over there? A Mr…Whitaker? From SLAM? Ooooooohhh…he looks NICE! Dang, wish I had pants on now…hopefully nobody will notice…”

Mar.5 at 2:58 pm

coach says:
‘ look into my eyes . look into my eyes . repeat after me .i am an adam morrison fan now . lebron is gay . d wade is gay . adam is a stud

Mar.5 at 3:02 pm

Alan says:
BLUE STEEL!!!!!!

Mar.5 at 3:13 pm

Bigi says:
…Can’t laugh…Money is watching…Plus,my Entourage is gonna wear BETcats jerseyz…Not Funny!!!…

Mar.5 at 3:14 pm

Bigi says:
NO MORE SOUP FOR YOU!!!NEXT!!!

Mar.5 at 3:16 pm

Mr. 416 says:
Did he say 1..2..3 then “cheese” or 1..2..Cheese. Damnit…..Momma !!

Mar.5 at 3:22 pm

Jim Morrison says:
“Really? You want me to smile and say cheese on the count of 3? How ’bout I beat your a** if you make one more reference to the recent study that shows a correlation between depression and marijuana??

Mar.5 at 3:29 pm

RonMexico says:
“Damn, i’m so tired from being on Leno last night. he’s soo not funny. i wonder if this photographer knows that i’m secretly in ninja school? i could do 3 backflips, and finish his half-caf-latte-with-tofu before he even says “bro, your stache reminds me of the raging 60’s man”. Ninja’s don’t need redbull…ninja’s don’t need redbull”

Mar.5 at 3:31 pm

Kevin Wilson says:
You’re my best friend, basketball. You don’t care that I cried … right?

Mar.5 at 3:34 pm

RM # 0 says:
Adam to mustache:’smile!!!! ‘
mustache to Adam : ‘At least I didn’t cried’

Mar.5 at 3:39 pm

Ely Rygier says:
I think everyone may be giving Adam too much credit. Right now he’s thinking…
“Why are they making me hold a basketball? Why cant I shoot it? Whyyyyyyyy? It almost makes me want to cry. Hey, that guy behind the camera is kind of cute. I wonder what he thinks of my moustache. Mooooooooostache. Thats a funny word. Other funny words are moist and magma. I should be a stand up comedian. Who needs basketball when I can be the next Chris Rock? Or maybe I’ll be like Shaq and make a movie where I’m a genie who rides around on a tricycle. That would be sweet. Oh man…these lights are so bright. I think I’m going to cry. Everything is just so intense, and there is so much adrenaline running through me. Boo hoo hoo.”

Mar.5 at 3:50 pm

Plyon says:
“I think this photogs checking me out. I mean, who doesn’t think I’m hot? Sure, I can’t hit a shot this year, but that doesn’t matter, cause I sport the holy grail of good looks, the porn-stache. Ron Jeremy has nothing on me. If John Amechi were still playing he’d probably be checking me out too. Hell, if Charles Barkley can get a kiss from Dick Bavetta, imagine what my ’stache and I could get from the old man! What? It’s time for the picture, ok, serious but sexy, serious but sexy, yeah, thats the look….”

Mar.5 at 3:51 pm

ALX8725 says:
“Hah. JJ Reddick didnt get no custom honorary tshirts, hows that for college-player-of-the-year-that-has-a-nba-career-worth-NOTHING. Who’s the best shooter in Gonzaga history? Adam. Who’s the best rookie on the BETcats? Adam. Who’s the man? Adam. Name the five best players ever to grace the NCAA like Adam: 1) Adam Morrison. 2) Adam Morrison. 3) Adam Morrison. 4) Adam Morrison. 5) Adam Morrison. Once I bring back the ’stache and the sleazey adult film star image, I’m gonna make society realize that it is alright to cry when you lose a game, whether NCAA/NBA or pick up! As for what I’m going to do tonight? The same thing I do every night, own fools in HALO2 with my xbox360! Where you b*tches at?”

Mar.5 at 3:57 pm

drudown says:
“Where are the buttons on my shirt?!?”

Mar.5 at 4:06 pm

Nique3011 says:
AM is thinking “34 more minutes of this BS and I can go back to doing what I love watching The Simpons” “I’m sexier than Mr.Burns damnit and this photo once again proves it.”

Mar.5 at 4:07 pm

mutoni says:
my ball and i are about to go play HALO. and no, you can’t join us.

Mar.5 at 4:20 pm

Justin says:
“dont look like kfed…breathe…be cool…millions be checkin this pic of me…should i pose like kg? nah…i could look like lil dun…kobe’s got the whole black mamba thing down…ill b…ron burgundy?”

Mar.5 at 4:33 pm

Fergie-Ferg says:
G..L..A..M..O..R…O-U-S! If you ain’t got no money take your broke ass home!

Mar.5 at 4:36 pm

Joe says:
It was either this, or my tuxedo t-shirt.

Mar.5 at 4:47 pm

John says:
I wonder why i wasn’t invited to be in the Nike Airforce commercial. Does this lady think im Steve Nash. You wanna touch my ’stache

Mar.5 at 4:55 pm

rza says:
dude…where’s my car?

Mar.5 at 5:01 pm

chambers says:
Oh dang, I didn’t even realise that there was paparazzi outside Primoz’s room. How am I going to explain the fact that I’m wearing his shirt?

Mar.5 at 5:15 pm

j-above says:
what i think??..
do i care??..ill just jack it up
see how many shots i need to shot about ehmm..25%

Mar.5 at 5:16 pm

DIO says:
dude…for the last time, I’m not related to Lion-O, I was born in the mid 80’s, plus I grew up the stache to distinguish myself from this monster …I’m tryin’ to make it work as a bobCAT not as a thunderCAT, isn’t that obvious??? what? don’t you believe me? wanna see the T-shirt inside??

Mar.5 at 5:16 pm

Chris says:
’stach we made it………..but you gotta smile

Mar.5 at 5:24 pm

Jack says:
“I swear on everything I hold sacred - Che Guevera, Marx, existentialism, 70’s hair, 80’s mid-range game - I will never again party with Rasheed the night before a photo shoot.”

Mar.5 at 5:38 pm

Chris Clarke says:
“Oh my goodness, I am so baked right now…today was a bad day to smoke marijuana for the first time in my life…I wish I could just get my hands on a bag of cookies…those new chewy ones are good…man, I LOVE chewy cookies…I haven’t eaten all day…I think my blood sugar is low…I hope I’m not sweating…I think I’m sweating, should I let go of the ball and wipe my sweat…ohcrapohcrapohcrap, I shouldn’t have smoked that grass…and I really, really need a cookie…maybe there’s a snack table around here somewhere…I think I saw one somewhere behind this lame backdrop…who picked this backdrop color anyway? They’re not even my team’s colors…”

Mar.5 at 5:40 pm

Tree says:
His mustache looks like something a child molester would have

Mar.5 at 5:49 pm

Ryan L. says:
“Man…I can’t wait for Coachella. Rage Against the Machine is playing. They are my favorite band of all time. I’m gonna sport my Che Guevara t-shirt to the show. I know Heytvelt can’t hook us up anymore, so the weed and shrooms are up to me. Dude!! That’s gonna be awesome. Aw crap! I, uh….What?”

Mar.5 at 5:49 pm

J R says:
“a basketball? a f**kin basketball? wow, real creative guys. wheres the horse and clown suit i asked for?” what? you want me smile? i dare you to ask me that agian. they’re so lucky i cant unleash the stache powers here. wait, is it weird that the girl that just did my makeup had a stache too? what ever. maybe i should get a tear tatooed under my eye. dam, rappers already do that.”

Mar.5 at 6:00 pm

tyron says:
HRmmmppphhh .. must suck it in …

Mar.5 at 6:00 pm

Tariq says:
“Wait…is Black History Month over?!”

Mar.5 at 6:01 pm

Tariq says:
“Damn non-Leap year…”

Mar.5 at 6:03 pm

Tariq says:
“Is it nucular or nuclear?”

Mar.5 at 6:04 pm

Tariq says:
“Mmm…chimichangas…”

Mar.5 at 6:06 pm

Tariq says:
“Adam, my man, you do have two things no one can ever take from you: clarity of mind and superior intellect…Mmm…chimichangas..”

Mar.5 at 6:14 pm

Shabe Sullivan says:
Damn, I want to be in the Strokes, be the drummer. Yeah that would be cool no one would pick on the cookie duster then. Tour Japan and Asia, damn wish this would hurry up, I gotta get back to watching Monkey Magic. Do I get Mexican or a burger on the way home. Might rent Clerks at Blockbuster, did I return Almsot Famous? Smile, what?

Mar.5 at 6:14 pm

Troy Dallas says:
“Here I am. Adam Morrision. Checking out the hot chick who is holding the camera, or the chick behind the person holding the camera, all the time hoping that he’s not being too obvious. Not that it matters cuz adam morrision has got the ’stache….The stache of soon-to-be-champions” (yes adam morrision thinks in 3rd person. get over it.)

Mar.5 at 6:22 pm

N says:
“Got Chocolate Milk…wait…that’s his real ’stache….Got dirt?”

Mar.5 at 6:40 pm

Frenchdude says:
Hum, I’m thirsty. I need a White Russian. No, no I can’t have it in public; or they will find out. I can’t. They musn’t know who my dad is. They musn’t know I’m Big Lebowsky’ Duke son. They can’t! Come on, try to lok bad, that’s how nba players look like, BAD.
But I’m thirsty though, hope dad didn’t finish the Kahlúa, hum …

Mar.5 at 6:53 pm

Simon says:
“Don’t make me take my shirt off!”

Mar.5 at 6:58 pm

Jack says:
“I smoke weed because I’m unhappy with my shot selection - and I take ill-advised shots because I smoke weed.”

Mar.5 at 6:59 pm

Luckyluciano says:
Morrison: I should be playing Hockey…

Mar.5 at 6:59 pm

Simon says:
“Man i hate wearing brand new shirts! I so should’ve washed it first. Its all stiff…..
Stiff! hehehehe!

Mar.5 at 7:01 pm

Simon says:
“Damn it! I’m picking the shirt next time mom”

Mar.5 at 7:02 pm

Simon says:
“…”

Mar.5 at 7:13 pm

Simon says:
“See, i’m much tougher than Larry Bird ever was. Look how tough I am!”

Mar.5 at 7:14 pm

Simon says:
“Adam Morrison for P.O.D”

Mar.5 at 7:14 pm

scott says:
Focus Adam… Harness the animal instinct of the Beaver!!!

Mar.5 at 7:20 pm

Frenchdude says:
I can’t believe they’re taking pictures of me, kids used to throw rocks at me. NBA makes people beautiful, it is true. I must hang on to that ball. Oh yeah, should I smile, isn’t it what the other kids did?

Mar.5 at 7:21 pm

SDarnell says:
“Another photo shoot, another comment about shaving my damn mustache! When are these photographers going to realize that I aint never gonna shave it off! I cant wait for my first official SLAM shoot, meeting Lang has been one of my dreams since I first started growing my stache and that was a long time ago as you can see. I can see it now - Slam issue number 109, “THE STACHE” not to be confused with D Wade as “THE FLASH” This phone number that the photgrapher just gave me, better really be Langs. The last number somebody gave me claiming it to be Langs, turned out to be the front office of the D-League. They all got a real kick out of that down there.

Mar.5 at 7:23 pm

Simon says:
“J.J Dude, where’s your t shirt?!”

Mar.5 at 7:27 pm

Rohit says:
“I wonder what J.J. is doing.”

Mar.5 at 7:28 pm

J-Dog says:
ugghh… the taste of last nights raviolie is still in my mouth…cant believe i trusted those stupid breath mints…wonder wuts for dinner tonight!?

Mar.5 at 7:29 pm

Rohit says:
“Rage against the Machine is getting back together?!?!?! I am not going to cry. Not gonna cry. Not gonna cry.”

Mar.5 at 7:30 pm

Rohit says:
“How come my moustache hasn’t gotten any thicker in the past two years?”

Mar.5 at 7:30 pm

scott says:
“keep them eyes uncrossed…keep them eyes uncrossed…gosh taking pictures is so hard”

Mar.5 at 7:32 pm

scott says:
“..101000100010101110…Be the Matrix…I am Keanu…apropo…etc, etc..”

Mar.5 at 7:33 pm

doc says:
“Porn mustache? Check. Dip-shit 70’s hair? Check. Awkward suggestions of a sexual relationship with the camera man that actually reveals YOUR issue? Check. Vague references to political philosophy that you half-comprehend? Check. Obvious observations of my marijuana use? Check. Admit it. You have no idea what I’m thinking. Either way, I bet you’ve never seen a velcro, button-up shirt before. Think about it.”

Mar.5 at 7:37 pm

Menachem says:
you know that it would be untrue
you know that I would be a lier
if i were to say to you
free stuff is gona take me higher
come on slam light my fire P.S. Especialy since I buy at the newstand and pay full price for your mag!

Mar.5 at 7:42 pm

Rohit says:
Who said Diabetes wasn’t sexy?

Mar.5 at 7:44 pm

Rohit says:
What the hell did Heytvelt put in these mushrooms?

Mar.5 at 7:57 pm

Jesse says:
Ricky Williams aint got sh*t on me. I been in the L a year and they aint busted me yet! All i gotta do is keep rocking these JC Pennies that Bickerstaff keeps sending me and they look the other way. Note to self, write Visine and thank them for that rush package they sent me All Star Fri night. Performance enhancer my ass, all i could see were knights in shining armor….i mean…lights and Jordan Farmar….
Ever gone 6-8 from the field including 2-2 from three and the ft line in a rookie game?
Ever gone 6-8 from the field including 2-2 from three and the ft line in a rookie game……on weed? Can’t believe they havent found out me n uncle Jim are related yet….Must be the Stash. Cant wait to get back to WA this summer, so much closer to BC, and you know what they say bout BC. Must be the Stash.

Mar.5 at 7:58 pm

Ante says:
I hate how you can never get the cool nba ‘gear’ in Australia, and dont get me started on the NBA coverage

Mar.5 at 8:29 pm

Jake Appleman says:
“Hey, hey–this is BJ. You’ve reached the mobile voicemail of BJ Evans of the Charlotte Bobcats PR department. Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.”
“Hey BJ. This is Jake from SLAM. We spoke earlier this week, and I left you a message the other day…Anyway, I really need to talk to Adam for my feature for SLAM 106. The original deadline has already passed and I’m really in a hole on this one. Can you PLEASE call me back? Thanks. Peace.”
(Two days later)
“Hey, hey–this is BJ. You’ve reached the mobile voicemail of BJ Evans of the Charlotte Bobcats. Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.”
“Hey BJ, man. This is Jake from SLAM. I REALLY need to talk to Adam. Can you PLEASE call me back as soon as possible. Another day or so, and I’ll have to just write the story without Adam in it at all. I really don’t want to have to do this. Again, thanks for your time and please call me back.”
(Two days later)
“Hey, hey–this is BJ. You’ve reached the mobile voicemail of BJ Evans of the Charlotte Bobcats. Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.”
(CLICK)

Mar.5 at 8:37 pm

drogo says:
“Befo’ my paper came, befo’ I got my fame
These hoes that’s poppin on me now didn’t even know my name
They said my flow was lame, they said I had no game
I told ‘em all I was fin’ to blow they thought I was insane
But then my name started blowin up quick, now they jumpin on………….”

Mar.5 at 9:04 pm

David says:
“You think i have this cheezy stach and bad hair because my fashion sense is lacking but check out this ballin’ shirt.. The real reason is if i cut em off everyone would know i was accually that dude from mighty ducks… you know the one just picture him.. but your not a fool are you?”

Mar.5 at 9:07 pm

jj says:
“My god I gotta take a shit! how much longer can this take?”

Mar.5 at 9:17 pm

s dot says:
if steve nash could win mvp with long hair, i’ll probably win jesus with this mustache

Mar.5 at 9:45 pm

kimchimonkey says:
“i love cupcakes”

Mar.5 at 9:50 pm

dean says:
“my moustache is great”

Mar.5 at 10:06 pm

GC33 says:
Is Adam Morrison gonna have to choke a b1tch???……

Mar.5 at 10:14 pm

thesubwayconnection says:
“I wonder if Ron Jeremy and his mustache ever posed like this? Maybe he turned his balls a little this way . . . Damn, I wish this was a blunt in my hand, I hate these stupid pictures, I’m supposed to be doing film! I mean, this ’stache is official, right? Why aren’t any of those companies calling me? Ron? Ron? If you can hear me, call me back, man! Teacher! Leave those kids alone! Man, why can’t I pay attention to anything? Must’ve been all that booze before driving with JJ. . . Damn! That was a good night! Oh, she’s asking me to move, does that mean I’m done? Alright! More Halo and beer!”

Mar.5 at 10:24 pm

Birkir says:
Non-contest related, I’m just waiting for you to dig into that Forbes list… Kevin McHale the no. 1 GM in all of sports? I thought Forbes was supposed to stand for reliable journalism…

Mar.5 at 10:24 pm

JpT says:
i am not a crybaby. i am not a crybaby..

Mar.5 at 10:58 pm

j says:
so here i am again…these cats have been nice to me…appreciate em for doing their job…why am i here again? is this my job? will people remember me more for my scoring, or my photo ops? i work soo damn hard all the time…k-mart in sactown and monta blew up this year…but i could also end up like shawn, and never ball again…whats my job? ballin, or taking promo pics to take care of the fam? the cash is good…tyrus showed us to keep our mouths shut…alright…so for this pic, im gonna be cool…cool and grateful.

Mar.5 at 11:00 pm

Chief says:
Umm i do look a little like Che Guevera. Don’t smile or you’ll ruin it ADAM! This ball..represents, um my ascension into the NBA life, the stache…bringin sexy back!
Shit I’m really really ridiculously goodlooking, Jordan had a stache right?
Shit so what i cried, I’m in the NBA son! Who cares that mullets are for hockey! I’m gonna look a little angry to show everyone i don’t care.
Emeka wants to go with just swords? I’ll fuck him up cause that’s just how i roll!
*SNAP*

Mar.5 at 11:37 pm

Patrick says:
I wonder if Justin Timberlake was really playing the piano at the Grammys? He’s a great singer, the best white dancer since Fred Astaire, so what if he shaved his head - he is only human, isn’t he? After I Tivo-ed the performance 27 times in a row, his playing and the keys don’t quite seem so “N’Sync.”

Mar.5 at 11:40 pm

Justin says:
Adam to photographer: It’s really hard to cry right on the spot without any motivation. Holding a ball, isn’t gonna help.

Mar.6 at 12:09 am

Timo says:
yah, so i broke out all my teeth with a golf club when jj sniped me out on halo…. as long as i don’t smile, no one will ever know

Mar.6 at 12:18 am

LordGefroh says:
“i want some dip.”

Mar.6 at 12:20 am

LordGefroh says:
“this new ball is cutting my fingers.”

Mar.6 at 12:21 am

LordGefroh says:
“WHY DIDN’T THE BLAZERS DRAFT ME???”

Mar.6 at 12:22 am

LordGefroh says:
“i don’t like collared shirts.”

Mar.6 at 12:33 am

Russ Bengtson says:
…

Mar.6 at 12:39 am

Theo says:
“This is the only camera angle which doesnt make my mustache look ridiculous…..”

Mar.6 at 12:53 am

Bill Biehl says:
Morrison rambling off random thoughts: “Man i wish i was like Lang Whitaker. If I use the power of this basketball and this mustache, I too could be the greatest basketball writer in the world. Maybe if i think about it real hard, i could be just like the Great Langster. Dammit, its not working. I shouldn’t have trimmed my stache. If my stache was thicker them maybe it will work. Maybe if i stand here long enough it will grow back in. Dammit it’s still not working. Maybe I can blame this basketball. They canned the new old ball and i know i could have acheived Lang-like greatness with the new old basketball. I cant find one of those balls, i dont see one anywhere. I’m just going to stand here until the magical stache grows back. Where did i get this shirt? This shirt is not Lang worthy. Damn how long does it take to grow my stache back? i’m still going to wait. To acheive a Lang like state, i need that full grow stache back. Is that Russ picking his nose? Where is that bum Ryan? Damn…..”

Mar.6 at 12:54 am

Bill Biehl says:
Ass kissing at its finest. Take notes.

Mar.6 at 1:02 am

Derek says:
I’m white.
I have a stache.
I’m in the NBA.
I’m so freaking nice.

Mar.6 at 1:42 am

Deuce21 says:
I’m the best wide receiver that has ever lived…..I can catch anything…….yeah, that right….

Mar.6 at 2:18 am

Adam Morrison says:
Allright, so if I write exactly what i was thinking when this picture was taken do I win even though its not funny? Should I write something crazy like how I might get an operation. What operation? Oh, im getting metal legs…its risky but its worth it. Or should I write down my name for my mustache? Its “Randy”, admit it you wish you had a name for your mustache. Or should I talk about movie lines; how I’d buy Lang a delicious bass, or like on old school where the name for his package was the octagon who was joined by dr.kenneth noisewater and james westphal. Wait a second I look brain fantanna…mmmm sex panther. I wonder if the camera woman would enjoy it, 60% of the time it works all the time (wink wink). Actually all I remember thinking about is the fact I had to drop a deuce like you wouldnt believe…

Mar.6 at 2:24 am

nerv says:
Dude, seriously, I told you I’m not tucking the shirt in so can we finish the photo shoot already…

Mar.6 at 2:29 am

Deuce21 says:
**FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE***MCDONALDS WORLDWIDE** McDonalds would like to honor our special employee of the month 16 year old Adam Morrison of Spokane, WA for dedication, commitment and flipping burgers at a store high 92% “Adam is such a hard worker” says PR Spokesman MyAzzizmy Gift, “You know he isn’t stealing food during shifts, one milkshake and he’ll only be able to play wheelchair basketball!” Adam will win a Microfibre composite NBA basketball (as seen in picture above) and a $20 McDonalds voucher. **END RELEASE**

Mar.6 at 2:46 am

deestarbuckz says:
“I wonder what Che would be thinking right now? He never wore a button-up! I have to continue in the struggle. Seremos como el Che!”

Mar.6 at 2:52 am

Western_dream says:
Man my Mo’ is that weak? I wish i was David Boon, thats a real ’stache. Check it. http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2004/12/07/wbboon_wideweb__430×255.jpg

Mar.6 at 2:55 am

Mike says:
“One look! One look!”

Mar.6 at 3:01 am

Tim Dogg says:
I know I look incredibly stoned in this photo, but actually I have just been crying.”

Mar.6 at 3:10 am

rg says:
“good ol’ ’stache. without you, i’d be mistaken for being seperated at birth with ‘the great khali.’”

Mar.6 at 3:16 am

El Boydelz says:
1. “I hope I don’t get no pit stains on Mek’s jammies.” 2. “NBA??? Throwback pornstar??? NBA??? Throwback pornstar??? 3. “Maybe I should ditch the ball for my NABMLA membership car, but it might appeal to the kiddies…” 4. “Do these French cuffs go with this trash ’stache?” 5. Gazes at his refection in the lens and ponders to himself “Would Mike ever think about signing John Amechi?” Goodnight and thank you…

Mar.6 at 3:17 am

El Boydelz says:
3. Redux Maybe I should dtich the ball for my NAMBLA membership card photo, but it might appeal to the kiddies…

Mar.6 at 3:36 am

Carl Denney says:
“i never took no ’shrooms!”

Mar.6 at 3:37 am

Dan(scruff) says:
Man I hope they put Dazed and Confused on blu ray. I hate doing these stupid photoshoots, well hey it’s better then sitting on the bench in Orlando. Those new wade converse weapons are nice, too bad I signed with the wrong company. I hope brevin knight passes me the ball tonight, I just can’t stand watching him throw up garbage shots. Why does everyone think I’m a hick because I have a mustache? One day I’ll have a cool nickname like when larry “the hick from french lick” bird became larry legend.

Mar.6 at 3:42 am

Kayote says:
“I don’t know who’s underneath my trousers, is it Lang or Russ?”

Mar.6 at 3:56 am

Sadaqat Ahmad says:
“Hello. My name is Adam Morrison and I’d like to talk to you about the dangers of basketballs made of synthetic composites. These so called ‘microfiber balls’ have been forced upon us by David Stern. I, and many professional basketball players just like me, have had difficulties in adjusting to this brave new world. My aim has been a little off which has obviously negatively affected my shooting percentage. This has been devastating, not only for my team which LANGuishes in the trenches of the Eastern Conference, but for my ego as well. The emotional damage is mirrored by the physical pain I have to endure WITH my fingers bleeding profusely after each game and practice. I’m not asking for much. Mere pennies will allow me to purchase the lotion and band-aids I need keep my fingers in pristine condition which will help tremendously. With your help, I am certain to return to the clutch shot mAKER I once proudly was. I thank you so much for your time and I just want to let you know that God and my ‘stache love you. Go Zags!”

Mar.6 at 3:58 am

Ian de Leon says:
make way for MR. SUAVE… (first thing that popped in my head when I saw the pic lol..)

Mar.6 at 4:00 am

Miggy says:
it aint right if it aint white.

Mar.6 at 4:08 am

Miggy says:
1. it aint right if it aint white. 2. lets play “guess the emotion”

Mar.6 at 4:35 am

andy says:
………………..catch…………………..release………………..swish……….

Mar.6 at 4:37 am

andy says:
yo adam, Snoop dogg wants his floppy hair back from the music video P.I.M.P.

Mar.6 at 5:47 am

One Shot says:
.
.
.
.
.
.
. . . actually, i kinda like chrunchies . . .
.
.
.
.

Mar.6 at 6:08 am

b55 says:
I picked up a basketball that was a layin’ there by the screen door, some folks calls it a ball, I call it a basketball. It’s just a round orange ball like a leather ball with black stripes an’ letters on it that’s shaped kind of like a ball… It’s what the boys use to play hoops and whatnot. Uhmm hmm.

Mar.6 at 6:59 am

Maravich says:
….What happened to that cat?…Woah!!? Photoshoot…man I love tiger beer…..Ok OK OK! By zelda’s sword thats bright…..I like basketball……there’s a woman watching…aaaaaaahhhhhhhh….Boom de di di de Booom de di…..I kill people…..By people I mean pets….by kill I mean kiss….By pets I mean english people…..aaaaaahhhhhhh! Woah!!??? Where am I!!????

Mar.6 at 7:12 am

Keith says:
Someone done stoled my wheels…..

Mar.6 at 8:48 am

Froggiestyle says:
It was a dark and stormy night, a shot rang out, the maid screamed, … and eddy van halen put down the guitar and picked up the ball…. alas he never did find that pesky razor, his arch nemesis.

Mar.6 at 8:57 am

Tariq says:
“Hmm… Is it Co-JI-to or Co-GI-to? Which one was the hard G again?”

Mar.6 at 9:03 am

Nick says:
“Drafted by Jordan, taught how to hold balls by John Amaechi.” Thank you, Thank you!

Mar.6 at 9:23 am

snyper 48 says:
damn,I’m so hot

Mar.6 at 9:53 am

Jon says:
This sucks because we can’t get them up here in Canada! I want that sgt. awesome shirt, but as usual it isn’t sold in Canada!

Mar.6 at 9:55 am

Jon says:
p.s. you would think that with the two time MVP being from Canada, that we could get some gosh damned apparel! Like the slam cover t’s that I can’t find! Get them sold on your site slam!

Mar.6 at 10:33 am

Logan Light says:
These photo shoots get so boring… I can only hold this pose for so long - How’s my hair? Good… of course it’s good. Anyway - what is it that you were supposed to do today? Oh yeah, give Dwayne Wade his shirt back…

Mar.6 at 11:11 am

Bigi says:
Eastern Conference…Sucks!But I DON’T!!!GOT IT!!!

Mar.6 at 11:16 am

Andrew says:
hey! What is this camera doing in here!? Listen buddy, this is an AB conversation, so why don’t you see your way to the door? Haha! You get it? That was a good one, wasn’t it, Stache? God I love you….

Mar.6 at 11:26 am

CBeezy says:
I can’t wait til this is done so Starsky and I can go jum over some hoods

Mar.6 at 11:28 am

1hush D says:
Ok, I have modified my quotes into an actual paragraph… “Zoinks! NBA, you would have gotten away if it were not for this meddling kid………I look pretty good today…….shirt by Goodwill 3 dollars, tshirt by yard sale - one dollar, a pre-teen moustache that looks like it will never fill in but that I can brand, priceless…….Karl Marx said ‘Capital is money, capital is commodities. By virtue of it being value, it has aquired the occult ability to add value to itself. It brings forth living offspring, or, at the least, lays golden eggs.’ That’s right Karl, I’m gettin my golden eggs baby! We are a long way from Spokane today….Big boys do cry. This here in my hands is the real opium for the masses and I got game. Viva Revolution! Viva Red Jesus! Ok, camera….let me give you sulky, and sexy and here is my pout….

Mar.6 at 11:38 am

abed says:
“MMMMMMMMMMMMmmm…I LIKE DEM TATERS….”

Mar.6 at 11:51 am

NAS says:
“John Ameachi is hot, I should get his number, I hope he likes me”

Mar.6 at 11:53 am

NAS says:
“I forgot my keys in the car”

Mar.6 at 12:10 pm

kristian Troen says:
“Hmmm… maybe i should start shavin, cause the stache aint funny any more, it hurts my feelings”

Mar.6 at 12:21 pm

Dan says:
“Strange, but I kind of look like a young Burt Reynolds! Damn I look good. . . “

Mar.6 at 12:22 pm

Dan says:
“Fuck Slam Magazine! ! !”

Mar.6 at 12:33 pm

coach says:
‘ got milk . ooops sorry . different commercial . got diabetes ‘

Mar.6 at 12:53 pm

kris humphries says:
Hasta la victoria siempè!

Mar.6 at 12:58 pm

kris humphries says:
I know you’ve come to kill me. Shoot, coward, you’re only going to kill a man.

Mar.6 at 1:00 pm

HB says:
“I wonder how my bangs look?, dumass photographer needs to hurry up my quesidillas are burning and im expecting a call from Ron Jeremy, he digs the stash, ya know..holla..god i love bein down, me and gerald wallace are cool, ya know, screw charlotte, stupid MJ takin my job, this shirt is trippy, i wonder what my buddies from the WCC think, mannn he had killer shrooms, oo and the needles, i miss those zags too…i wonder if anybody got any zig-zags around?”

Mar.6 at 1:03 pm

kris humphries says:
Let me tell you this, the older you do get the more rules they’re gonna try to get you to follow. You just gotta keep livin’ man, L-I-V-I-N.

Mar.6 at 1:13 pm

craigilla says:
I wonder if I would have gone number one if I was black?

Mar.6 at 1:16 pm

craigilla says:
Tom Hanks’ Wilson just challenged my Spalding to a 1on1

Mar.6 at 1:21 pm

craigilla says:
I only smile when I’ve got my sombrero.

Mar.6 at 1:25 pm

kris humphries says:
Camerawoman- “My God, what is that smell? Oh.
Ammo35: “That’s the smell of desire my lady.”
Camerawoman: “God no, it smells like, like a used diaper… filled with… Indian food. Oh, excuse me.”
Ammo35:” You know, desire smells like that to some people “

Mar.6 at 1:47 pm

Aaron says:
I knew when I went to the barber I shouldn’t have asked for the Larry Bird..

Mar.6 at 2:01 pm

Andrew says:
hi, i’m adam morrison, i’m about 6′8′’, lenky, i love to shoot, a little scared to go get rebounds(someone might rip my fake moustache off and i’d have to wait until i hit puberty to grow a real one).

Mar.6 at 2:23 pm

Jeremy Varlow says:
A take on Justin Timberlakes “sexy back”, aka Adam Morrisons theme song, “Stache’s Back” “I’m bringing stache’s back…. Y
YEAH
You other white boys dont know how to act…. YEAH
You cut your hair like you are all so black….
YEAH
I’m the next Bird and you know thats a fact…. YEAH
Take em to the Bridge Dirrrrty baaaabe, you see these brown locks make the girls raaave
I’ll bring em to my place and put on some RAGE
Then we’ll lay ’round and we’ll talk bout CHE
Noone but Diabetes makes me feel this way….
Take em to the chorus Come on ‘Cats
Go ahead, grow a ’stache with me
Come on Gerald
Go head, grow some locks with me
Come on Josh and Theo,
You can’t do the shrooms without me
Come on MJ
Go head, just admit you doubt me
I’m bringin staches back
Go head, get growin with me *aside: for those that dont know. “JOSH” and “THEO” refers to Josh Heytvelt and Theo Davis, two Gonzaga Zags that were found with Weed and Shrooms in their car this year. I know a comedian isn’t supposed to explain their jokes, but for this one I had to* ps… I wear a size small Lang

Mar.6 at 3:17 pm

sean says:
“I wonder who would win in a steel cage match - Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka or The Junkyard Dog? Probably the JYD.”

Mar.6 at 3:58 pm

parisha says:
I HOPE THEY DON’T USE THIS FOR THE COVER OF SLAM OR WILL I EVEN BE ON ONE????

Mar.6 at 3:58 pm

parisha says:
i hope they don’t use this for the cover of slam or will i even be on one

Mar.6 at 4:18 pm

Chris Clarke says:
They are pretty baller-ass shirts, but almost 200 comments? I can smell the lost productivity from here…

Mar.6 at 4:29 pm

Ray Finkle says:
Roosevelt High 1982 Senior Prom
Theme: “Wonderful Tonight”
Best Couple: Adam Morrison & A.G. Spalding

Mar.6 at 4:46 pm

mutoni says:
i think dan should win the shirt.

Mar.6 at 4:46 pm

Ste-Mac says:
Damn, I’m all fucked up.

Mar.6 at 5:46 pm

Bruno says:
a paragraph that reveals the mind of Adam Morrison??? … I dont know but he looks pretty pissed off about having to take this kind of pictures for his membership to “White Men Who Love Their Moustaches” and the two friends that let him know about that club were Lang Whitaker and Sam Rubenstein

Mar.6 at 6:12 pm

kris humphries says:
Now the formula is this…Me, Meka, and G
For those who can’t count it goes 1-2-3
The mustache…growed out is how I be
Brothas find it’s hard to do, but never me
Some brothas try to dis the stache
You see’m eyeing me
Don’t worry about them other rooks, my shot be hittin
Trainin gladiator, anti-hesitator
sgt awesome shoot the fader from here to Granada
Mister energetic
Who me, ball pathetic?
When’s the last time you witnessed a funky diabetic?
I don’t know man(3x)
I don’t know(2x)

Mar.6 at 6:18 pm

d.c. says:
i wonder why they made me wear an ugly ass wrinkled shirt to do this photo shoot i bet emeka doesnt have to put up with this shit

Mar.6 at 6:25 pm

matt marinucci says:
Maybe I should quit basketball and just start driving an ice cream truck…

Mar.6 at 7:09 pm

Clay says:
I feel a little crazy
I feel a little strange
Like I’m in a pay phone
Without any change
I feel a little edgy
I feel a little weird
I feel like a schoolboy
Who’s grown a beard I’m livin’ in the 70’s
Eatin’ fake food under plastic trees
My face gets dirty just walkin’ around
I need another pill to calm me down I feel a bit nervous
I feel a bit mad
I feel like a good time that’s never been had
I feel a bit fragile
I feel a bit low
Like I learned the right lines
But I’m on the wrong show I’m livin’ in the 70’s
I feel like I lost my keys
Got the right day but I got the wrong week
And I get paid for just bein’ a freak I feel a little insane
I feel a bit dazed
My legs are shrinkin’
And the roof’s been raised
I feel a little mixed up
I feel a little queer
I feel like a barman that can’t drink a beer

Mar.6 at 7:21 pm

Paco says:
WOW, I am one good lookin kat. I wonder if I looked this good cryin on the floor last year? YEAH, I prolly did. Man i can not wait to get outta here and go get some food, the shrimp in the back was nasty. I feel like gettin some BK, I wonder if JJ Reddick will go with me? HUM, ok man five more pics aight, I gotta make a….DANG!!! I can’t believe that I’m wearing this shirt. Hey yo someone call up my Moms and tell her to bring me a new shirt of something. Aight man we done. Not sure if you followed the Bobcats last year, but we got work to do. Me and my STASH….OUT!!!

Mar.6 at 7:52 pm

James says:
Alright Adam, here it is. Smile with your eyes. Nothing to worry about, you got the power of the stache. With the stache on your side, you know it’s money. You’re a star, this shot will be worth millions. That’s right, I’m the man.

Mar.6 at 9:30 pm

Henry says:
“Man, I forgot to eat something before this photo shoot and that’s why I am HYPOGLYCEMIC right now. I feel so I tired right now(from the hypoglycemia), I just need a donut right now. Man, I hope no one sees the drool stain on my left wrist; I knew we should have used my right side (it’s my better side). What was I thining when I picked this shirt out??? When is this going to be over, I need to take a BIG #2 right now??????”

Mar.6 at 10:11 pm

Nelson James says:
Adam: Hey…hey, there sexy…who’s there in that sexy lens? Is that my reflection?
…Damn, I shoulda known it all along! *Spits Dip out* Well, yea, I kick ass. I kick plenty of ass.
I kick so much ass, I get foot pains… …from kicking so much ass.
Yeah, I said it. I went there. I cried on national television and I’ll probably cry the first time I get laid. And it will be beautiful. Still, not as beautiful as my mustache. One time I kissed a girl, and she said to me, “Adam, you’re mustache tickled me.” And I told her, “Baby, that wasn’t my mustache.”
_____________________________

Mar.6 at 10:34 pm

mamadou n'diaye says:
i was going to post but damn, the kris humphries tribe remix is tough to top…..props to the new guy holding down my 12th man spot on the raptors

Mar.6 at 11:10 pm

ballin boy says:
Oh no those bean tacos are comin back to haunt me. Maybe if i keep a straight face nobody will smell anything…..oh no that one was a little loud….did anybody notice…i hope nobody noticed…phew i think im in the clear. just hold onto the ball and keep a straight face…hold onto the ball and keep a straight face. hold onto the ball, keep a straight face and squeez the cheeks. I almost forgot to squeez the cheeks. Please God let me get the hell outta hear without anymore embarassment.

Mar.7 at 12:51 am

rob shotgunn says:
dont let the cop stache fool you im a bad man. i will straight slap a kitten in public. i will even do it in front of security cameras and leave visible marks because that is how uncop like i really am. freeeze….sikes

Mar.7 at 1:18 am

Clay says:
@Ante. I hear you man… Australia is a lonely place for a NBA fan(atic). They don’t even play NBL games on free to air TV anymore!
Damn pay TV… its ruined sports!

Mar.7 at 1:51 am

Blaze says:
man this photo shoot is gettin boring, i cant wait to go home nd watch my rented movie brokeback mountain with my boyfriend greg ostertag… and then maybe ill watch my cousins in wrong turn after that.. mayb after that ill burn my upper lip because wut was i thinkin w/ this moustache.. oo how long till greggy??

Mar.7 at 1:59 am

Jared says:
Here i stand, staring blankly into a camera while thousands are gonna look at me still wondering why in the hell i look so rediculous. but it’s the power of the ’stache that keeps making me so rediculously good at the sametime. if there is any doubt in your mind what i will do for the NBA in the next decade just sit back and realize i was the chosen one to carry out the dream I have a dream…. that one day i won’t be judged for crying in the middle of the floor… I have a dream that my children will not be judged by my ’stache but by the content of their “GAME”. This is my hope, Believe in me, for there are many more suprises to come!!!! Out

Mar.7 at 2:05 am

matt says:
no defender will ever take me seriously with this ’stache any average 14 year old could grow… now all i need is 2 cut a mullet outta my hair n couple that with my whiteness, ability 2 cry at will n being in the eastern conference n i will b mvp next year!… … oh yeah n hit puberty

Mar.7 at 2:44 am

RM # 0 says:
“YEAH BABY !!!!!, I’ve got my mojo back!!!!!”

Mar.7 at 3:07 am

Casey says:
Wow, there’s a lot of responses, but I’ll give it my best shot… “Damn, when is this shiutyourmouf gonna get over so I can get back to what I do best, lifting weights and listening to Metallica! Couldn’t they have just taken my boy J.J. and put a dead Furby on his head, magic markered a nice little stache and called it a day? Straight up though, you don’t mess with my man J.J. That dude is like Sam. Jackson from Pulp Fiction, Martha Stewart, and President Bush all rolled into one. Ahhh, J.J. how I long for the days when it was just you and I with our headsets on, and you would whisper sweet nothings into my ear. We were, and are still, miles apart, but you’ll always be in my heart…*sigh*”

Mar.7 at 4:22 am

t2c.wah says:
“You know why my playing time is so low?
Oh you think it’s because of my Basket Ball skills (or lack of it) right?
But in fact when I’m not on the court bricking open shots (yeah because I can’t create my own shots…), I’m fighting for Freedom & World Peace dude…
You know, NBA is not an end for me; it’s just a mean to achieve my ultimate goal:
The Nobel Peace Prize.”

Mar.7 at 4:31 am

t2c.wah says:
“I know my ’stache & my overall look are very disturbing but do you think that Enersto “El Ché” Guevara could have led the revolution in Bolivia & Cuba without his beard?!?”

Mar.7 at 5:18 am

Brian K says:
“Impossible is nothing, mustaches are everything.”

Mar.7 at 5:55 am

Ian says:
The camera man was told to point up because of the sternbots new rules on non-corporate belt buckles.

Mar.7 at 7:00 am

Brian says:
“Least i ain’t gettin posterized hea…”

Mar.7 at 7:14 am

Teemu S says:
010001110101000111010101010111100…

Mar.7 at 9:29 am

aaron says:
Defense dont win championships, staches and fadeaways do.

Mar.7 at 9:30 am

B-H says:
Oh they’re running this in SLAM? So I guess I’m not allowed to smile.

Mar.7 at 11:28 am

Bimbo Coles says:
“a few more minutes of this posing and picture taking garbage and i’m just gonna snap! i have no problem deflating this spalding with an unrelenting barrage of haymakers to my head. the only time i’m ever posing for photos again is if and when i finally get the credibility to be on the cover of slam! other than that, this jenn pottheiser woman and getty images better silkscreen this photo to a t-shirt! i’ve been dying to wear something with my name on it, other than this shameful bobcats jersey.”

Mar.7 at 11:51 am

imaginaryplayer says:
“adam morrison bringing the ball up the court. charlotte is down by a deuce, 16 seconds on the clock, and the bobcats are out of time-outs! the sonics send a second defender at morrison! 12 on the clock! morrison is frantically scrambling. an open okafor is under the basket! morrison declines to pass! 7 on the clock! morrison is hounded by 3 defenders! matt carroll is set up in the corner pocket! morrison ignores him, drives hard to his left, steps back behind the arc and picks up his dribble! lewis, allen, and ridnour are absolutely draped over morrison! he pump fakes once! twice! three times fades and lets it fly! and…BANG!!! adam morrison connects from 26ft for the win! the crowd goes bananas!!! the bobcats snap their 7-game losing streak! what a shot! the stache strikes again!!! adam morrison!”

Mar.7 at 11:55 am

imaginaryplayer says:
a bunch of women rush the floor but security prevents them from getting anywhere near morrison. morrison tells the security to let them go. they rush morrison and pile up on top of him. what a sight! adam morrison for the win!

Mar.7 at 12:31 pm

Brian K says:
(points finger) “I’m coming for you, Jason Kapono.”

Mar.7 at 12:35 pm

Brian K says:
“Don’t let the JCPenney shirt fool you…by the end of this season, you will feel the wrath…the wrath…of the ’stache.”

Mar.7 at 1:02 pm

Lang Whitaker says:
OK, kids, commenting is now closed. A winner will be announced shortly. Thanks!

Mar.7 at 5:32 pm

» Quick Shots: Starbury, Agent Zero, Content Catcher, “The Hills” - SLAM ONLINE says:
[…] 2) The Adam Morrison Contest I had to shut down the comments because you guys were killing it. And also because we hit our time limit. The coments are now being analyzed by people who are great at analyzing contests in order to select a winner. I’ll post that later, and when I do we’ll launch part two of the giveaway. Overall, great work, peoples. […]

Mar.9 at 5:03 pm

» Fri-Day!: Morrison, March Madness, Best Western - SLAM ONLINE says:
[…] • We have a winner in the Adam Morrison contest. The winner? Even though many of you came with the hilarious full paragraphs, my favorite response was this one simple line from Aaron: “Hold me closer tiny dancer…” […]