A People’s Champ’s History of Khalid Salaam
You thought I would let the week go by without mentioning our Giants-Eagles rivalry?
Khalid Salaam. A great writer and editor. A good person, and a nice guy. I consider him not only a co-worker, but a friend.
Unfortunately, Khalid is a Philadelphia Eagles fan. I am New York Giants fan, who might be a little bit sick in the head. We have a somewhat civil rivalry, and the trash talking this week hasn’t gone too far. Khalid’s main point is that the Iggles are so decimated with injuries to players like their sweetheart QB who pukes his guts out more often than Nicole Richie, their underachieveing “superstar” nicknamed “The Freak” who was blasphemouly referred to as the next LT when he was a rookie with the Titans, and so on. I’m sure Khalid has a bunch of other excuses ready. He has been spending the week reminding me how down and out the Eagles are, and that the Giants better not blow this game - kind of like how Philly blew their 24-7 lead over the Giants in front of their booing, injury cheering home fans - cause the loser probably won’t be making the playoffs. Kind of like how the Eagles didn’t make the playoffs last year.
But there was a time when Khalid didn’t have to resort to hating on the Giants. His Sillydelphia Eagles were flying high, on their way to the NFC Championship game year after year, and one time - GASP - they even made the Super Bowl. I now present to you, for your weekend enjoyment, a short graphic novel that I like to call:
A People’s Champ’s History of Khalid Salaam
That’s right, bold and italics. It’s that big. This is my first graphic novel. I don’t want any money for this. All I want is for Khalid to read it and bubble over with anger and/or shame.
GO GIANTS!!!
Have a great weekend everyone!
29 Responses to “A People’s Champ’s History of Khalid Salaam”
Dec.15 at 4:14 pm
cdrumz86 says:
Brilliant.
Dec.15 at 4:18 pm
HIBACHI!!! says:
I’m an eagles fan so I’m with Khalid..and my bro is a Giants fan so we have a similar rivalry. but that was funny as hell. big up Sam.
Dec.15 at 4:29 pm
DubsGonDoIt says:
The Eyes Have It! Pure comedy. As a Niners fan I still have painful flashbacks of Roger Craig fumbling away the playoffs to the Giants & the Eagles stole our cancer T.O. (momentarily at least). So I hope the game is a blood bath with no winners, but my money is on the Eagles. Jeff Gayia > Eli Manning
Dec.15 at 4:37 pm
Ron says:
Sam, I speak for all Eagles fans when I say that come Monday we will be flying high over the NY Midgets leave dropping on your foreheads. BALLIN’!!!!!!
Dec.15 at 4:39 pm
Melissa Brennan says:
WOW Sam WOW. You might have to come work in my department.
Dec.15 at 4:44 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
Hell Hath No Fury…….
Dec.15 at 4:45 pm
duderson mccool says:
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG-MEN.
Dec.15 at 4:48 pm
albie1kenobi says:
I too applaud Mr Rubenstein’s artistic direction and great execution. those bugged out eyes are fantastic! like a real graphic novel. bravo!
Dec.15 at 4:51 pm
Ben says:
Ballin’!
Dec.15 at 5:00 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
It would be too easy to reply with some angry rant. Lets just see if Samron has the same energy on Monday. Btw, the G in G-Men doesn’t stand for what you think it does…….
Dec.15 at 5:01 pm
HIBACHI!!! says:
Khalid Salaam just killed yall with the G-MEN comment…and he prequelled it with a Clipse reference (one of the best albums in hip hop this year..shouts to Lupe, Nasir Jones and The Game)…Khalid should be yelling HIBACHI with the heat he is bringing EA-GLES!
Dec.15 at 5:10 pm
DubsGonDoIt says:
I think Khalid is understandably cautious to say too much about how the Eagles are going to win & in the process quite possible causing Sam to jump out a window. To that I say let out your ferocious angry rant Khalid. It will only makes Sam’s pain worse when he has to look at this post after the Giants lose.
Dec.15 at 5:24 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
I’m not super confident in the Giants, but I had to write this. It was a lot of fun, and the Giants should win this game as long as Eli doesn’t give it away. Philly can’t stop the run, and they can’t run on the Giants.
“I’m a N.Y.G., like Jeremy Shockey” - 40 Cal
BRANDON JACOBS is coming.
Dec.15 at 6:30 pm
Nadav Mor says:
drawwwwin’
Dec.16 at 6:52 am
Boing Dynasty says:
Im not Giants or Eagles fan and since neither of these teams is doing shit this year, lets look ahead. Next year, McNabb will be back, FREAK will be back, Reggie Brown, and Don’te Stallworth are looking like NFL recivers, thier starting RB dosent want to hang with Boom and Mike Irvin on sunday afternoons…At least youll always have Manning the lesser…but Jacobs is a bad dude, to bad he only was one disernable talent.
First Place feels great. GO STANTS(not cause of that whole Katrina thing either)
1
Dec.16 at 1:15 pm
mutoni says:
saturday morning british soccer announcer: “brilliant…ohhh….that was simply brilliant!”
Dec.16 at 2:15 pm
Jake Appleman says:
Sam, This is better than me actually watching the game. J-E-T-S, “Not-Quite-Talented-Enough”
Dec.17 at 8:09 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
i h8 eli so much
Dec.17 at 8:24 pm
Waters says:
How do you like them apples? Eagles by 2 touchdowns
Dec.17 at 8:32 pm
Sam Rubenstein says:
i do not like them apples at all.
Dec.17 at 9:13 pm
Waters says:
I would say give Eli some more time, but he has had what like 3 good games all season, if that?
Dec.17 at 9:16 pm
BETCATS says:
Eli is garbage and Peyton is a cock suckin cry baby ARCHY IS THE MAN
Dec.17 at 9:21 pm
Ryan Jones says:
Sam & Khalid, you guys know I don’t watch much football, but I watched most of this one. There was 7 minutes left and the Giants were up one, and then the guy who was supposed to deliver our luggage that never got here yesterday came and I had to go downstairs and meet him. This took like eight minutes. Then I came back upstairs and the Eagles had scored like 40 points in 18 seconds. And all I could think of was that moment Monday morning when (depending on who arrives first) Khalid and Sam see each other for the first time. It is these moments I will miss, and I really wish all the slamonline fiends could witness it. It will be wonderful.
Dec.18 at 12:39 am
dj says:
SAINTS!
Dec.18 at 6:50 am
bja says:
“Hell hath no fury like … ”
Um, Khalid are you trying to intimate that you’re a woman scorned here?
Have fun sticking it to Sam.
Dec.18 at 4:00 pm
Khalid Salaam says:
E A G L E S !!!!!.,..We fly high MF’s!
Jan.5 at 4:39 pm
» The Playoff Appocolypto: Giants at Eagles - SLAM Online says:
[…] A People’s Champ’s History of Khalid SalaamBy Sam Rubenstein Khalid Salaam. A great writer and editor.A Christmas with EliBy Sam Rubenstein I’m at my girlfriend’s family’s house inCrazy time beginsBy Sam Rubenstein The baseball playoffs are set. We’re closedLashing OutBy Sam Rubenstein WARNING: I am not going to beThe D.A.Y. Phoenix copied Dallas againBy Sam Rubenstein Great weekend for me. Got my heatThe D.A.Y. of Nugget revengeBy Sam Rubenstein I am writing this late on SundayThe D.A.Y. the Mavs finally lostBy Sam Rubenstein Khalid is not going to want to ARCHIVES BY DATE […]
Mar.23 at 5:14 pm
» Saying Goodbye to Playstation 2 - SLAM ONLINE says:
[…] This week has been… interesting. The NCAA tourney has been competitive, but a year after the George Mason miracle as well as about 48 other upsets, it’s been pretty straightforward. This would be the time when the NBA season drags on, but Kobe changed everything. We’ve got Kobe-related material from everyone. I was looking forward to putting up one of my non-basketball Friday fun pieces, like the graphic novel I wrote about Khalid the Eagles fan. Right now it’s Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe, and I understand that. But you know what? This following post will never be timely or even .000000001% meaningful on any level other than at this very moment right now. It has nothing to do with basketball, but if you are a gamer, you might enjoy it. Here goes. […]
Mar.23 at 7:24 pm
Aidan says:
How great is comic life btw - I use it for everything.